Repeat
by ladybug82896
Summary: Bella is married and immortal but is she happy? She is second guessing her choices and wants a "do over." Well in this story that is exactly what she gets. Full summary inside. PLEASE PLEASE READ! and REVIEW!:D Will Update soon!:D
1. Thinking

**Summary:** **One day the happily(now not so happily) married and vampire Bella begins to wonder if she had made the right choices. One day she is hunting alone when she smells the strangest thing. She follows her nose and finds a mad that has no scent whatsoever. Everything has a scent… except for this man. She talks to the man and when their conversation begins to close the man asks her if she would ever want to "do over" her life. She answers "yes" and the man smiles. She gets up and walks home dawdling. Suddenly it begins to rain, then hail, then snow. Bella starts to hurry home when the ground drops and she is sent back in time to when Edward had left her. Will she make the same choices or "spice things up" a bit? What will happen and will her choices alter what she thought to be her perfect life.**

**(She lost never conceived Renesmee. She was just changed because she wanted to be changed. She hasn't talked to Jacob ever since the wedding and thinks of him constantly. It's been 1 year since she got married to Edward. In eclipse Bella wasn't sex crazed either and on their honeymoon they didn't have sex. Ideas from the movie 17 again. May be sexual content later on.)**

**Thinking**

**Bella's POV**

I was standing on the balcony looking at the stars. A cool brisk wind blows through my hair and I stare at the full moon and start to wonder.

Did I make the right choice? I remember when Edward left me, I never let go of him. I always tried to find his presence and I always tried to hear his voice. What if I had let go? Would I have forgiven him so easily?

Of course I knew the answer to that question but I didn't want to face it. Not yet. Because if I did face it that question would start an onslaught of questions that I would like to avoid. Or would I?

What if I hadn't jumped off of the cliff? Would he still have come back like he says he would have? Would I have fallen in love with Jacob? Jacob.

My days and nights were now filled with thoughts of him. Things were not left right between him and me and I missed him so much.

I think Edward knows I'm thinking of him. He's been acting so strange lately. He hovers around me asking constantly if I need anything and telling me that he loves me. He buys me gifts and smothers me with kisses and never pressuring me to have sex.

I know this is what every girl wants, a gorgeous man that loves you and holds you and wants what is best for you, but I guess I was expecting something… more. I feel like Edward me is smothering me.

I give a sigh and sense Edward behind me but make no move to turn around and face him. It isn't until I feel his cool breath on my neck that I turn around.

"My love, does something trouble you?" he asks his lips skimming my neck.

Should I tell him? No. Why would I tell him that I long to so see my friend that is far more than a friend? That I wish I could just hear the voice of my best friend that I love? That I wasn't sure I had made the right choice in marrying him and choosing immortality over Jacob?

"I'm just a little… thirsty is all."

He gave me a skeptical look like he knew what was really wrong with me but he didn't push the issue.

"I think I'm going to go hunting." I said as I turned back to the balcony.

"Do you want me to join you?" he asked.

"No, I'll be quick I promise." I said. I turned and gave him a small kiss on the lips. He smiled and I turned and jumped off of the balcony. I flitted through the forest until I got to the spot where I stopped on my first hunt.

I bent into a crouch and sniffed. I smelled all of the aromas of the forest. I smelled the honeysuckles and the tulips and lavender flowers. I smelled the deer and the bears and then I came across what must be the strangest scent I've ever smelled. Nothing.

When you are a vampire you smell absolutely everything. You smell the air the people the animals and even the plants. Everything has a scent.

Except for what ever was emitting this nothingness. I followed the scent or should I say the non-scent and found… a bald man.

**I know it's short but it's more of an intro chapter. Please review. I will get the second chapter up ASAP!**

**ladybug828:D**


	2. Stranger

**Check out some of my other stories if you haven't already done so. Send me a message I really don't mind a bit of constructive criticism. I will try to update all of my stories as soon as I can. (I am so a TEAM JACOB and so is this story.)**

**Stranger**

**Bella POV**

…_a bald man_

* * *

He was sitting on a log with a blazing fire in front of him.

"Ah hello there." The man said, his voice enticing and warm. He was rather stout he had a round belly and little crinkles by his eyes from smiling and a small mustache.

"Uh hi."

"Won't you sit down? I have some excellent marshmallows and hotdogs that we can roast. Somehow I just knew I would have company and brought a bit extra." He said.

"Umm no I'm on a… special diet." I said sitting down on the log beside him. Why was I here talking to this strange man?

"Ah yes. You are a vampire yes?" I turn and look at him my eyes wide. How did this mysterious man know about me and why wasn't he scared.

"I am not scared because you are a vegetarian in a way. You only drink the blood of animals."

"How do you know this?" I asked astonished. But the man just smiled and pulled something from behind the log. It was a dead deer.

"Here." He said handing me the deer. " Drink up. You must be thirsty."

I grabbed the deer and sunk my teeth into it. It was still warm. I felt the warm liquid trickle down my throat. The whole deer was drained within seconds.

When I dropped the drained animal and looked back up the man was smiling at me.

"All better?" he asked. I nodded.

"So what are you doing out here all alone? Why aren't you with your mate?"

"I just needed some fresh air. Some time to think and get my head straight."

"Ah, you are second guessing your choices." He said pulling a marshmallow out of the flame and popping it into his mouth. How I missed the sweet taste of a perfectly roasted marshmallow.

"No…yes. I just don't know if I made the right choice. I mean I took a chance when I married him and became immortal. I gave up my family, my friends, and… someone else that means a lot to me. I mean I love Edward but I feel like he is smothering me. I guess I just expected something different." I looked at him. " I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm telling you this." I said.

He smiled. " Its perfectly fine. I'm the one that asked you remember."

"Yeah, so what are you doing out in the forest alone at night?" I asked.

"I have no idea. I just had an urge to come tonight. Many strange things happen that one does not understand. You say that you loved your mate or what was his name, Edward, and that is why you gave up everything to be with him. But you must ask yourself was it really love? Is that really what you felt?"

"Yes." I said. He gave me a quizzical look.

"No. It wasn't love it was an addiction. It was a need to have him close. Like… like a drug." I smiled seeing as he called me his own personal heroin when we had first met. It was exactly like an addiction.

When you have an addiction you have to have more of your drug just like I always wanted more of Edward. When you have an addiction to a drug and that drug gets taken away you do anything you can to get that drug again and sometimes risk your life. When Edward left I went crazy trying to hear his voice being reckless and then I almost killed us both when I jumped of a damn _cliff_ to see him!

God I was so naïve and stupid! I gave up true love for this fake love, blinded by this horrid addiction!

"I have to try and find my _true_ love. I was blinded by the addiction with Edward and gave up the best thing that had ever happened to me. God I wish I could just go back in time." The man looked at me and gave a mischievous smile.

"Would you really like a do over, a repeat of your life?"

"Yes. It would be so much easier than trying to patch things up right now. It wouldn't involve as much heart break."

"What if I told you that if you were right outside of your father's house in two hours something amazing would happen that would allow you to go back into time?" he said.

"I'd say you were crazy." I said my eyes turning into suspicious slits. He just smiles. I get up off of the log.

"Well it was nice talking to you but I should probably get back."

"Of course." He says.

As I get farther into the forest the light of the fire disappears from my view. Was he serious? If I was right outside of my house in two hours would I be able to go back in time? Well there isn't any harm in trying. The sooner I break it off with Edward the sooner I can go find Jacob. I look at my watch, it's 10:00 pm. I have to be outside of Charlie's by midnight.

I run back to the house using as much power as I can muster. I get back to the house in a matter of seconds. As soon as Edward sees me he comes to kiss me. His lips meet mine and I feel the passion he has but it has no affect on me. Not when I know that I should be kissing someone else.

I pull back and he looks at me with adoring eyes. God this was going to break him.

"Listen we need to talk." I said.

"Of course." He said. His eyes dimming a bit. " Lets go into the living room. Everyone else is in California hunting so we can have some privacy." He says leading me to the living room. We sit down and I turn to him and take his hand.

"Edward." I say not knowing how to start ripping out this beautiful mans heart.

"I think I made a mistake."

"What do you mean? Whatever it is I forgive you. You know I would never blame you for anything." Why did he have to say things like that? He was just making this worse.

"Edward I think I made a mistake in becoming a vampire and…" I paused looking at his face. It was getting paler by the minute, "and marrying you."

He closed his eyes. When he opened them again the expression in them was the last thing I thought I would ever see in his eyes at this moment. It was anger.

"What did I do wrong Bella?" He asked raising his voice. "What the hell did I ever do to you that suddenly makes you want to leave me?"

"It wasn't all of a sudden. I have been realizing it slowly ever since the day I married you. This isn't love Edward. This is an addiction."

"And what's so wrong with that?"

"Edward addictions aren't healthy. Our relationship is the same as a drug addicts with his drug. Edward we always need more of each other. When you left me I did anything I could to see you hear you and when you thought I was dead you went and tried to kill yourself so you could see me or so you wouldn't live without me. God Edward we have to stop this."

"So you just used me to become immortal is that it? You never loved me?"

"Edward I would never ever use you. I said I made a mistake in becoming immortal as well. Edward I always did and always will love you I was just never in love with you."

"So you don't want me anymore."

"Edward this relationship isn't working for either of us and you know it." He looked down but said nothing. I put my hand on his cheek. And he lifted his eyes to me.

"I love you and I always will but I need to find my true love Edward and so do you."

Now there was anguish in his eyes. I got up and he got up as well we walked to the door in silence and when I got to my Ferrari I turned to him.

"Here you probably want this back." I said as I slid the ring he gave me off of my finger and gave it to him.

"I'll give you the car tomorrow I just have to get to my father's house."

"You can keep the car. It was a gift."

"Thanks." I said.

"Will I ever see you again?"

"I don't know. Maybe." I walked up to him and pulled his lips onto mine.

He kissed be back, all of his sorrow in his lips. Knowing that this was the last kiss we would share he didn't hold back. His tongue skimmed my bottom lip asking for entrance and I granted it. His cool tongue invading my mouth. I held onto him my hands tangled into his hair. Our kiss slowed and I pulled back.

"Goodbye." I whispered against his cool lips. I turned, got into my car, and sped away Edward's sad face the last thing I saw. I was sobbing without tears. I got to Charlie's house one minute before midnight. One minute before two hours. I got out of the car and stood on the porch looking at my watch. It would be midnight in 5…4…3…2…1.

Nothing happened. I sighed and walked back to my car when the ground started to rumble. Then suddenly the ground dropped. It just… dropped. I was floating through time and space.

I thought about the moment Edward left me and how that changed everything and I was suddenly in a dark abyss. Then my feet touched the ground. The same ground I was standing on when Edward left me.

**Ok I know it's a little short but I promise they will get longer. Now that she is back in the time we all know and love things are going to get interesting. I will Update ASAP! **

**ladybug82896 :D**


	3. Old Friends

**Hey guys sorry I couldn't update. I just got to my dad's house and It's really hard to get access to a computer. He works in the office with his laptop and that's where the desktop is that I work on. I'm also helping my step-mom( she's really nice) with her daycare business so it's kind of hard to find the right time to update but I will. I am determined to get something else up before or on Christmas, but if I don't HAPPY HOLIDAYS!(This includes Christmas Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and any holiday you celebrate. ) Enjoy! REVIEW!(P.S. I kind of just made up a year in this chapter because I'm not sure if I put what year it was in the last chapters but if I did and I'm wrong please correct me.) WARNING!: My cause yearning for marshmallows. :D**

**Old Friends**

**Bella's POV**

"Goodbye Bella.' He touches his lips to my forehead and then he's gone. Suddenly I feel pain rush through my body. I fall to my knees clutching my middle as a searing pain rips through my chest. I feel tears stream down my cheeks. He left me. I'm no good for him I…wait. Didn't I already go through this? He left me for my own good, not because I wasn't good enough for him. I get up and walk back to Charlie's house, open the door and plop down on the couch so I can think.

There is no way that crazy old man was right. I haven't traveled back in time. I'm probably being punk'ed right now. Edward left me years ago…didn't he? I run over to the counter and trip on an uprooted piece of tile. I stop. I can't trip… must be my erratic state. I scan the kitchen counter and find a newspaper, but when I check the date it reads: _September 22, 2009._

No, that can't possibly be right. Yesterday it was January 18, 2013. There is no possible way this could happen unless… that old man was right! And if he was right then that means I'm human again! I belt to the cupboard and take out a bag of marshmallows. Then I venture to the fire place add some wood and paper and then finally set the mixture ablaze. I scurry to the kitchen grab a stick, and put a marshmallow right on the top. I sit at the fire place roasting my marshmallow for about 3 minutes until it is golden brown. I slowly take it of the stick and pop it into my mouth. It tastes delectable! I roasted it for just the right amount of time and it melts into my mouth. The sweetness and the burning flavor collide to make a mock heavan Oh, how I missed the simplest things like a roasted marshmallow.

I get up and put the marshmallows up before sitting back down on the couch. I'm really getting a chance to repeat my life. But I still feel the same feelings as I did the first time Edward left me.

"That's because this has rules." I jumped to find the old man sitting right next to me.

"How did you get here? What are you?" But once again he just flashes me that inexplicable smile.

"I'm here to explain the rules to you." he says ignoring my questions.

"Well I'm not really explaining rules but I'm explaining why you feel the way you do and other things you might experience." I nod indicating for him to continue.

"Well you have been sent back in time to the moment of your choice. You will remember everything you have done but you will have the same feelings as you did when the events first occured."

"Well that complicates things a bit. My feelings were the reason I wanted to go back in time so if I'm going to have the same feelings what was the point of coming back?"

"True your actions were guided by your feelings most of the time but you did not know what you know now. If your mind can overpower some of those feelings then you may end up taking a different path than you did before. Just remember that you are in control and you should be fine." I'm about to ask him something else when I hear Charlie walk in. I glance at the old man but he's no longer there.

"Hey Bells!"

"Hey Dad."

"What are you doing here? I thought you would be out with Edward." I feel the hole in my chest grow at the sound of his name. My feelings want me to rush to my room and cry. "Ummm." I choke not quite able to get the words out. I close my eyes and concentrate.

"He and I are no longer together. His family is moving and he thought it best not to have a long-distance relationship." I say the words no more that a whisper.

"Oh. How you holden' up Bells?" I want to crawl into a hole and never come out.

"I'm fine dad. Really. It's just... a little hard."

"Well the Billy invited us to a bonfire tonight, but if you don't want to go I'll stay home with you." You go I'll stay.

"No, I want to go. What time is the bonfire?" Charlie smiled.

"It's at 7:00 tonight at First Beach." Great I have some time to prepare myself." I'm glad to see you're handling this so well." He adds before sitting in the chair and turning on the telivision.

"I'm gonna take a shower." I say walking up the stairs. I stip down and turn on the water. As the how water flows down my back and my body relaxes but my mind goes crazy. I feel like I have an angel(my mind) on one shoulder and a demon(my feelings) on the other.

_You should go. Jacob will be there I'm sure and after all he is the reason we came back._ Says the angel.

_No you shouldn't. You're one true love just left. You can't go flirting with Jacob. It'll be like betraying Ed... him._ The demon retaliates.

_Oh he'll be back._

_It doesn't matter if he'll be back she's still in pain._

_First of all her pain is caused by you. Second, Jacob is the one that makes the pain seem to disappear. He is the right one for her._

_No he's young and way in over his head. He isn't for her. _

_Oh, and Edward is? That jackass just left her in the forest saying that he didn't lover her and that she wasn't good enough for him. First of all, where does he get the nerve to take away her self confidence and make her anti-social? He should be ashamed of himself. Second, why the hell did he lie to her? Did he want her to hate herself? Does he want her to go try and off herself just because he can't think of a fucking excuse?_

_Aren't you supposed to be the angel? Angels don't swear._

_No but she does. I'm just a figment of her imagination just like you._

Ugh. I was getting a headache.

"Shut up!" I say raising my voice. Thankfully it's quiet again save for the sound of the water hitting the tub. I stop the water and get out wrapping the towel around myself. I look at myself in the mirror. My skin is no longer ice cold, my eyes no longer golden, my agility and speed gone, and my beauty has faded away. All of that has been replaced by warm soft skin, chocolate brown eyes, my clumsy feet and mediocre speed, and my normal no make-up plain Bella self. But even though all of my great assets have faded away due to my being human I wouldn't trade my plain human self for anything in the world. And with Jacob I don't have to.

I walk into my room and go straight to my closet. I look through all of my clothes and end up choosing to wear a nice red V-neck sweater and my skinny jeans with some fur lined brown boots. I look at myself in the mirror knowing Alice would be proud of me. Alice... what will she think when she gets back to find me gone. What will she do when Edward tells her what I've done? Will she be mad or worried? Will she try to come and see me and what will she do when I'm not at Charlie's, when he hasn't seen me at all because I only waited outside his house.

Charlie's knock on the door pulles me from my worries. "Bells are you almost ready? It's 6:40 and I want to leave at 6:45."

"Yeah I'm almost done." I say reaching for my diamond stud earrings and a shell necklace. One more look in the mirror and I open the door to find Charlie waiting down stairs.

"So you want to take your car or just carpool with me?" he asks.

"I think I'll just take mine." I say as I grab my keys and head out the door. When I get in the car I notice the old stereo Edward's family got for me and my heart sinks. He had left me in this time and I am destined to leave him in the future. My hand moves towards it wanting to rip it out of the dash board but my mind knows better. It's gonna just make my car look shitty if I take it out without the right tools. Without another glance at the stereo I start the car.

When I arrive at first beach I'm greeted with a huge hug from Jacob.

"Hey Bells." he says grinning.

"Hey Jake. What's up?" I say grinning right back.

We walk to the beach to find Billy Charlie and a bunch of other people I don't know in this reality but in another. There's Quil, Embry, Sue, Leah, Seth, and Harry all gathered around a campfire. I look off to the side and see Sam and his pack walking off giving Jacob a strange look before heading off into the forest.

"So Bella this is Sue and Harry." Jacob says explaining to me what I already know. But I shake thir hands and say 'hi'.

"And they're Leah and Seth's parents." he says directing me to a rather grumpy Leah(but then again she's always that way) and an eager Seth.

"Hi, I'm Seth that's Leah." Seth says nodding towards his sister.

"Hi." Leah says quickly looking me up and down before turning back around to stare at nothing.

"And this is Quil and Embry." Jacob says directing me towards his horny friends.

"Why hello there. I'm Quil, Quil Atera."(A.N. sorry if i spelled it wrong)He says making an attempt to flirt with me.

"Bella." I say reaching out and shaking his outstretched hand before glancing at Embry.

"Hi I'm Embry Call."

"Nice to meet you." I say shaking his hand as well.

"So what grade are you in?" Quil asks.

"I'm a senior. You?" (A.N. Once again I'm sorry if I got that wrong.)

"Junior." he says.

"You are not, you're a sophomore like the rest of us."Jacob says calling him on his bluff. Quil glares at Jake as he and Embry walk away

"Let's eat." Jacob says. Grabbing a plate. He piles his plate with so much food I'm surprised it hasn't broken. To think he ate like this before he became a werewolf.

Everyone eats and talks sharing stories...except me. My feelings just can't get over Edward. Quil sees me sitting alone and shamlessly tries to flirt with me.

"So you know even though I'm a sophomore I really am 17 because I got held back and you know if you ever want to you know have a bit of fun just ca-"

"Hey Bells your dad is calling you." Jacob says coming up behind Quil smirking. I get up and walk with him feeling Quil's gaze on my back.

"Thank you your timing is impeccable." I whisper.

"Hey it wasn't my timing it was Charlie's." he says winking at me. We walk over to the parking lot to find Charlie and Billy saying goodbye. Dad turns to me.

"Bells I'm gonna go home but your curfew is midnight." he says before giving me a quick kiss and backing out of the lot. Jake turns to me.

"You wanna go for a walk?" I nod and we set off along the beach.

"Sorry about Quil. He thinks he's a ladies man when he's really just an idiot."

"It's fine." I say looking at the ground. It feels wrong and right to be here. God I wish my present feelings would just go away and leave my mind.

"What's wrong Bells?" I hesitate. I can't tell him I've traveled back in time and that the feelings I had years ago and my mindset in the future are colliding making it extremely difficult to concentrate. He'll think I've lost it!

"Ummm, Edward left me." I say my voice shaky. Jake stops and gives me a huge hug.

"Bells I'm so sorry. He's the stupidest guy in the world. He doesn't know that he just gave up the best thing that ever happened to him."

"Thanks Jake." I say feeling the tears making their way down my cheeks.

"Anytime." He says wiping the tears stop and sit down gazing up at the moonless sky. There is no moon because there is no Edward. Edward will always be my moon and Jacob my sun. The only difference is I can live without the moon but with out the sun I would die. Jake and I stay there not saying anything, just staring until I look at my watch to find it is 11:45 and that we're the only ones left on the beach.

"Well I should probably get home."

"Yeah don't want you to get in trouble." Jake walks me to my car and gives me a huge hug before I set off thinking of him the whole way home.

I arrive to find Charlie passed out on the couch.

"Charlie come on get in bed." I say shaking him until he finally uproots himself and drowsily makes his way up the stairs and into his bedroom. When I get into my bed and my head hits the pillows I'm instantly sleepy. And because my mind and feelings are always battling, I cry myself to sleep with happy thoughts of Jacob.

**Ok I'm sorry if i got some things wrong but I don't have the books with me. If I can't get another cahpter up by Cristmas then I'll try to get one up by New Years. HAPPY HOLIDAYS! Hope you all get what you want for Christmas!**

**ladybug82896 :D**

**Review!**


	4. Author's Note

Hey guys, I'm really sorry I haven't been able to update lately. A lot of things have been happening. I got a new baby brother, I lost my iPod, I've been trying to keep my grades up so I can get a new iPod, something's been happening in my love life and I've got a lot of homework. I'm on spring break right now though so I'm going to try my best to update all of my stories. Look out for some updates soon. TTFN!

-ladybug82896 :D


	5. Let The Games Begin

**I am so sorry! I haven't updated in FOREVER. I know I have to get on it but I have a bunch of stories and a little time. Ok so here we go!**

**Let the Games Begin**

**Bella's POV**

I woke up the next morning and realized I had school. It's been so long. I lost all of my friends when I lost Edward the first time but that wasn't going to happen. I was determined to hang out with my friends. I got up and went to my closet. How would Alice dress me? I felt a pang. I had forgotten that only Edward knew that I left. What were they doing? Were they mad at me? Will I ever see them again? Of course I will. I shook my head and picked out some jeans and a green t-shirt. I walked downstairs and had some breakfast before grabbing my keys and heading to school.

When I got in my truck I noticed the radio that Emmet had gotten me for my birthday again and again I reached for it but then put my hand back on the wheel. I had ripped it out the first time but it was a stupid gesture. It was a nice radio and I liked having something to remember them by. I reached for the radio again turning it on this time. _Possibility by Lykke Li _came pouring from the speakers.

I made it to school and parked but because Edward wasn't there to save me a spot it took me a while to find one. I stepped out of the truck and started walking to English when I was intercepted by Mike.

"Hey Bella, where's Culle- Edward?" I felt the hole in my chest ache."_Of course Mike would notice Edward wasn't here as well as everyone else so you better get used to it."_ I took a deep breath. Let the games begin. Feelings vs Mindset. Round 1.

"He moved away with his family and he thought it best not to have a long distance relationship so we're not together anymore." Mike's face lit up.

"Oh, I'm sorry Bella. But at least you're free now you can do whatever you want. It seems like Cullen was holding you back anyway." Mike said putting his arm around me.

"I guess so." I said as I pulled away from him and took my seat in class. I took my seat in the back of the class. It felt empty without Edward in the room with me. I went through the day not really paying attention to anyone or anything. At lunch I sat with Jessica, Mike, Ben, Angela, Eric, and unfortunatly Lauren.

"So." Lauren said as soon as I sat down. "I heard you and Edward broke up."

"Yeah we did."

"Oh Bella I'm so sorry. How are you?"Angela put an her hand on my shoulder.

"Why did you break up? Did he finally realize how uninteresting and bland you are. Did he finaliy realize that he needs a real woman." She said in a way that made it sound like "like me" should be at the end of that sentence. I felt my anger rise( which my mind was controlling) as well as my pain(which unfortunately was controlled by my feelings).

"No Lauren he actually moved away."

"So he broke up with you." I could tell the sentence had a second meaning. Like _"Of course he would break up with you over something minor like that. You could have kept going but he didn't want to because your ugly and ordinary."_

_"No _actually I broke up with him. I didn't want a long distance relationship." Lauren glared at me but she didn't say anything else. It was silent for a minute.

"Well it sounds like you need a girls night out." Jessica said finally breaking the silence.

"Yeah that sounds great!" Angela said. "You up for it Bella?" I smiled to myself. I mad the right decision when I came back.

"Yeah sure."

"Ok I'll pick you and Angela up at 8:00 this evening." I noticed that she hadn't said anything about Lauren. She did to but the bell ringed before she said anything.

I sighed as I left the lunch tale. My next class is biology. I always had biology with Edward. It's the class that started it all. Wow that sounds cheesy. I walked into class and sat in my usual seat but my usual lab partner was missing. All through class I couldn't concentrate and I just felt the whole get bigger and bigger. My face probably looked so screwed up because I was at war within myself.

I wanted to cry but I really didn't want to cry. I felt like a freakin nutcase. Dammit this is hard! I was so happy to hear the bell ring so I could get the hell out of there. The rest of the day wasn't as bad.

Once I got past biology it was all downhill from there. When the final bell rang I was so happy. The first day of school had taken a lot out of me. I hadn't been to high school in ages. When I got to the parking lot I didn't see my truck.

I started to panic. Who would want to steal my truck. Then I remembered I still had Victoria after me. Would she steal my truck to get me to walk home so she could pick me off. No she doesn't know that the Cullens are gone yet because Laurent hadn't come yet. Then who would steal my truck.

In the midst of my confusion I heard an engine loud and clear. I looked up and saw Jacob in his dad's car. He swung over to the curb and opened thr passenger door for me.

"Hey Bells."

"Jacob, wha..."

"I thought you might want to get picked up today. Since Edward left you I think you needed something to make you feel special. So I acted like I was sick to get out of school came and picked up your truck and brought it to your house before you got out of school. They I got my dad's car and came to pick you up and now here we are. Now are you gonna get in the car?" I smiled and hopped in.

"Wait how did you get my car home if you didn't have the keys?" he grinned and waggled his eyebrows. I gave him a look that said, _"If you don't tell me how you high-jacked my car then I am going to kick your ass."_

"Alright, alright I may or may not have used your spare key."

"How did you know about that?"

" You told me where you kept it when we were little. That day when we were making mud pies. You swore me to secrecy" We both smiled at the memory.

"Well I'm glad you came and picked me up. I need a little cheering up after this day." He grabbed my hand. It was warm, he was warm. Even before he was a wherewolf he was warm and sunny.

"I didn't say anything about cheering you up I'm going to take you to my torchure chamber."

"But you said you were going to make me feel special and torturing me wouldn't make me feel special."

"Would you feel special knowing that you are the only person I would cut school, high-jack a car, and kidnap just to torchure."

"Maybe a little."

"Ok then I'm doing my job. To the TORTURE CHAMBER!" he said as he drove faster. I laughed. We reached his house. He got out of the car and opened my door for me.

"Thank you but I thought you were supposed to be torching me."In a flash my hands were behind my back and we walked towards his house. He opened the door and did an evil laugh.

"Behold the torcher chamber. Dirt and grime everywhere! Dirty clothes lying around the house!But worst of all no one puts down the toilet seat." I gave an ear splitting scream and we both laughed. Jacob put his hands over his ears.

"God. Remind me never to torture you again." I grinned.

"Come on." he said as he took my hand and led me towards a little door. He opened it and turned on the light to reveal his grage. It had his unfinished Rabbit in the middle and various car parts and tools everywhere. I loved Jake's garage. It felt so homey.

"Sorry it's so messy."

"It's cool."

"Hey do you mind if I work a little bit? I don't wanna be rude."

"Yeah go ahead."

He immediately got to work. At one point he took his shirt off and was left in his tank top. His muscles rippled. He had a nice body already. Being a wherewolf just enhanced his already perfect features. We talked while he worked. We mostly talked about him.

"So what kind of car is this?" I asked already knowing the answer but it seemed like a question I would normally ask.

"It's a Rabbit. I'm building it from scratch."

"Wow. That 's amazing. Must be really tough though."

"It is pretty ard but I enjoy it. So what happened with you and Edward." I looked down at my hands.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to Bells."

"No it's ok. I'm ok. Well um one day Edward didn't come to school and I found him at my house after school. He asked me to take a walk with him in the forest which he never did. We didn't walk very far I could still se my house through the trees. He told me that he was moving. And he said that we should beak it off. I argued that loads of people had long distance relationships but he was set on breaking up. Finally I asked him why he didn't want to have a long distance relationship and he said he didn't love me. He said I was no good for him which basically means I wan't good enough for him. And he just left. I turned and walked back to my house and that was the end of it." I didn't realize I was crying until Jacob came over and wiped the tears away from my face.

"Bells I am so sorry." he said putting his hand on my face. He seemed genuinely sorry unlike Mike. " He doesn't even know what he's given up. You are so amazing and he is an idiot for leaving you."

"I'm not amazing Jacob I'm plain. I'm ordinary I'm nothing special. That's why he left." Did that really just come out of my mouth. I know that's not why he left but that's what I felt.

"Bella I don't ever want to hear you say that you are not ordinary. You are so unique. I mean what other girls do you know of that can wear sweats and a tee-shirt without worrying if anyone is going to see them? What other girl can light up my world just by blushing? No one Bells." I looked up. His face was so close. We locked eyes. He moved closer.

I closed my eyes. I could feel the warmth of his breath. His lips were so close to touching mine I could almost feel them on mine. I could almost feel their warm softness. I was so close but Billy knocked on the door and we both jumped away from each other before Billy opened the door.

"Hey Bella I didn't know you were here. Can you stay for dinner. I looked at the clock. 6:30.

"No sorry Billy. I have to cook for Charlie and then I'm going out with my friends tonight. Maybe tomorrow."

"Sure thing. Jacob were you sick today?"

"Yeah I had a soar throat and a stomach ache." Billy cocked one eyebrow but said nothing as he turned around.

"So uhh. You're leaving?"

"Yeah I gotta cook for Charlie and yeah." I gathered my stuff and we headed out towards Billy's car. The drive to my house was silent. It was an akward silence because no one wanted to talk about the fact that we almost kissed. We got to my house and he parked in the drive way.

"So you're coming back tomorrow?" he asked.

"Most definitely." I opened the door and walked in the house.

"Hey Bella where have you been?" Charlie asked.

"I went over to Jacob's."

"Oh. Well how's he doing?"

"He's doing fine. He's building a car from scratch. It's amazing. He's got some skills."

"Really well I'll have to see it sometime." It was quiet for a bit and I started to make sandwiches for both Charlie and me. I set the food on the table and called Charlie. It was pretty much silent while we ate.

"Hey dad, Jessica and Angela thought I needed a girls night out after the whole...Edward(wince) thing. Can I go out with them tonight. They said they will be coming around 8."

"Sure just be back by midnight."

"OK."

After dinner I washed the dishes and then went to get ready for my girls night.

**Sorry not much is happening in this chapter. I have to get a little farther until things start to heat up and because I know we all want to see a little more happen between Bella and Jacob in the next chapters I am going to speed up the bella mourning process. You'll see what I mean soon just don't get mad at me please. The next chapter will be the girls night, the scene with the bikes(No it will NOT be to hear Edward's voice but just for the fun of it.) and the scene with the movies. REVIEW!:D**

**TTFN**

**ladybug82896**


	6. Girls Night, Stalkers, and Craziness

**Things are going to be different from the book. I know I said I would update but my boyfriend broke up with me and I really was not in the mood to write a love story. After a nice tub of ice-cream and watching New2 Moon a billion times I'm getting over it though. (Taylor Lautner's abs really helped me move on.) I thought you guys deserved an update. Ok sorry if it's a little dry. And thanks for all of the people that reviewed. You guys are the ones that really made me want to update. Oh yeah and everything in itallic is thoguhts. If I missed some then just act like they are italic. OK here we go…****P.S. There is nothing wrong with being gay. You will see why I say this when you read the chapter. I am in no way promoting the fact that gayness is wrong. Gay people are awesome! I'm not gay but I do think that gays are very good people. They are freindly most of the time. And so i don't have to keep torturing my self with this...**

**Disclaimer for the WHOLE STORY: I DO NOT OW THE TWILIGHT SAGA OR ANY OF IT"S CHARACTERS! There I said it. Ok on with the story...**

**Girls Night, Stalkers, and Craziness**

**Jacob's POV**

_We were so close damn it! Why did my dad have to come in? I mean don't I get any privacy?_ I was sitting at the dinner table staring daggers at my dad. I was so pissed of. And then it dawned on me. I almost kissed Bella, and she almost kissed me back! The stupidest grin spread over my face. Of course Billy noticed.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Oh nothing, just something Quil did today. Or rather a girl did to Quil." Hey that was a good cover up. My grin got even wider as I relived what happened. Quil had been dating Danielle Sankara but he liked Vanessa Ugotani because she had big breasts. Danielle was walking with her lunch right behind Quil when he was describing how he saw Vanessa's cleavage in P.E. and how it bounced when she ran.

Danielle was so pissed she dropped her books on his foot, started digging in her lunch bag until she found her frozen water bottles and threw them at him. I have to admit she had really good aim. After the water bottles went she took her hot tea(lord knows why she had hot tea) and threw it on Quil. He went screaming and running up and down the halls shouting, " HOLLY SHIT THAT IS FUCKING HOT!" Unfortunately for him he ran right by the teacher's lounge and he got detention for a week. When he got out of the principal's office Embry and I were rolling on the floor laughing.

I chuckled coming back into the present time. Billy eyed me suspiciously as if knowing what I was really thinking about at first but continued his meal. When he finished he went into the living room and turned on the T.V. He was most likely watching ESPN.

I went back to the garage and started working on the Rabbit again. I was getting close to finishing it. I just need some more parts and that would mean I need some more money. I was checking of what parts I already had and counting up the parts I needed when Quil and Embry walked in.

"Hey what are you guys doing here?"

"Well, seeing as I just got dumped I think that I needs some cheering up." Quil said. Embry and I were both trying not to laugh.

"Shut the hell up!" _We didn't say anything. _

"Sorry, sorry go on."

"Well I think since you two didn't help me when I was running up and down the halls after I had gotten hot tea and two rock solid water bottles thrown at me, that you owed me a night on the town."

"No that's not how it works. It was your fault you were talking about another girl when your girlfriend walked by not ours."

"Well that's just to bad Black because Embry already agreed." I glared at them.

"Fine. But I'm not paying for anything I'm already tight on money as it is." I walked in to tell Billy.

"Hey I gotta go help Embry cheer Quil up after his beak up. Can i have the keys to the car?"

"Okay just be back at 11:30."

"Aww come on. I'm broken hearted." Quil said sounding teary with a stupid smile plastered on his face. Billy just chuckled.

"Fine you can come back at midnight but you better be back on time."

"Sure sure." We all got in the truck and I started the ignition. "So where are we going?" I asked.

"Port Angeles." Oh god.

**Bella's POV**

I was upstairs when the door bell rang. Charlie answered it and I did a once over in the mirror. I looked decent. I had on my black skinny jeans and I paired it with a deep red solid shirt and my brown jacket with dark and light brown strands of fur in it as well as my black water-proof boots. I hoped I wouldn't fall. I mean they weren't heels or anything. That would just be suicidal, but they were wedges. I cautiously walked down the stairs. Angela and Jessica were waiting in the living room chatting with Charlie. They were sitting so close to eachother I was surprised Jessica wasn't already in Angela's lap. I was noisy and almost tripped like usual. They turned their heads relieved to see me.

"Hey Bella." They said removing themselves from the couch and walking up to me to giving me a hug.

"You guys ready to go?"

"Yup." Jessica said looking a little anxious to leave. I don't blame her. The conversation with Charlie was probably a bit weird. I kissed Charlie on the cheek and left. We all piled into Jessica's car and got on the road.

"So where are we going for our girls night?" I asked after a couple minutes of silence passed.

"The only place to go. Port Angeles. " Great.

Pretty much the whole way to Port Angeles Jessica was talking. I inserted a couple of nods and "Wow's" into the conversation but she was like a moder boat. Once she started it didn't take much to keep her going.

" I totally think that Edward is a jerk. He thinks he is so great because he's gorgeous and rich. The posh little pretty boy. He could have kept the relationship going." Jessica said at one point in the car ride only making me feel worse about myself. I knew why but it still kind of hurt that he didn't even trust me enough to let me make the decision. I mean it's my life." You should go to LA and castrate him. That sure would teach him a lesson." Added Angela pulling me from my thoughts. I stared at her with my mouth hanging wide open. Did she really just say that? She blushed a little.

"What?"

"What did you do with Angela?" This only made her blush more. But then her face hardened into a serious mask of resentment and anger that I had never seen cross her soft facial features before. "Well if you don't want to do it then I sure as hell will. He thinks he can just get away with this. You know what... I bet he's gay."she said the realization making her smile.

"Oh my god he is gay. I mean why else would he always have his hair perfectly straight? Why else would he have designer form fitting clothes? And sometimes when he came to school he looked like he was wearing lipstick! He is gay!"Angela said laughing. **(A.N. Agian there is nothing wrong with that.)**I couldn't help but join in although her notions were ridiculous. I knew the reason for hes cleanliness and his perfect...well everything was because he was a vampie, and I certainly knew that it was Alice's fault he showed up in designer clothes every day. The "lipstick" was blood obviously but Angela didn't know that.

"You know what, I think you're right." I said, the words pouring from my mouth before I even knew they were escaping. I knew it was wrong but I was pretty pissed off at Edward for leaving me. Even when we were married. I just never told him. We pulled up to the curb laughing like drunken sailors.

"I bet he irons his underwear or something!" Jessica laughed.

"I bet he has an array of different color lipsticks. You think he's an winter or a spring?" Angela laughed. When the laughing died down Jessica shut of the engine and we walked got out the car. We had pulled up right by a boutique.

"They have the cutest clothes her. Hey, maybe Edward would like to shop here. I should so give him their card." Jessica said causing us all to giggle as we walked into the store. We shopped around for a little bit. I actually found some cute black flats and a nice blue sweater. We got into the car and set off to our next destination. The movie theater.

**Jacob's POV**

"What did you want to do in Port Angeles?"

"Well first I want to go to a movie and then I know this great club that-"

"Oh no we are not going to a club. Clubs cost money and that is not something I have at the moment."

"Come on Jacob. You could meet someone there."_ I don't need to meet someone. I already have some one. If you ass holes would just get out of my car I could turn around so I could think of something to do the next time she comes over._

"All the hotties go to this club," Quli continued," They don't even check I.D. most of the time. All you have to do is act like you're older and they'll let you in."

"Quil listen to me closely. I. Don't. Have. Any. MONEY!"

"I'll pay for you." I sighed. I guess that left me with no reason not to go. I felt like I was cheating on Bella though. No I just wont talk to anyone, dance with anyone or flirt with anyone. I should have gotten a marriage bad so everyone would think I was married.

"Fine. What movie do you want to see?"

"Crazy For You, Crazy For Your Blood_._ It's about this girl that tries to kill her ex and this guy that's trying to kill his ex and the two killers meet and fall in love. It's a romantic comedy with plenty of blood."

"Whatever." I said. This was going to be one hell of a night.

**Bella's POV**

"Crazy For You, Crazy For Your Blood?" I grimaced at the title. This was not going to help me get over Edward. I could just tell by reading the title.

"Yeah it looked so funny! A girl is trying to kill her ex for dumping her and a guy is also trying to kill his ex for dumping him and both of the two killers meet when they are stalking their exes and fall in love." I felt a wave of relief. For a second I thought it was going to be about vampires. Alright. We went and bought our tickets and went inside.

"Ok I'll get the popcorn and drinks you guys get the seats." I said.

"Ok but don't forget to get some sour candy." Jessica said." And some sweet candy for me. They handed me money to get the refreshments and I waited in line. When I finally went to order I was interrupted by some loud boys. They came in laughing like idiots. _Stupid immature teenage boys. They have no manners._I payed for our things and then tried to grab everything. That was obviously a mistake because As soon as I took my third step the popcorn toppled over. I waited for the crash of popcorn against the tile floor but it never came. I looked down and the popcorn was standing right-side up and only one piece was on the ground.

"Huh. Weird." I said as I grabbed the popcorn and went to sit down.

**Jacob's POV**

Everything went weird when we got in line to buy our tickets. We got to the front of the line to buy our tickets and Quil decided he wanted to have a little fun. THe woman behind the window was in her mid-40's probably in her mid-life crisis. She had pasy white skin with a million wrinkles. Then right by her nose she had a huge mole with a nasty hair coming out of it.

"Why hello there." Quil said. I knew that voice. That was his flirting voice. _Oh my god he is not about to do this!_

"How you doin?" He asked in a deep manly voice. I smirked at the line Joey from that show Friends used to flirt with girls.

"We would like three for Crazy For You, Crazy For Your Blood. But if you want you can make that four and then just tag along." he said giving her a wink. She blinked obviously surprised. She regained her composure quickly although it looked like she poked her breasts out a little bit more. _That's just gross lady._

"I would love to. But I don't get off for another three hours. But maybe-"

"Oh that's just to bad. My dad says I have to be home once the movie is over. " He said grabbing the tickets and sliding her some money. I noticed that he was about five dollars short, but she didn't.

We walked into the theater laughing our asses off." Did you see that lady? She was totally into you it was so gross!" " Ha I know. She actually thought I was being serious!" I knew it was wrong what Quil did. That woman is probably heart broken. But she had it coming. You don't go after a teenage boy when you're 40. If has a habbit of hitting on teenagers shes not a couger she's a pedophile. We were about to walk into the theater when Quil poked me.

"A girl was at the concessions stand. She had a bunch of stuff and was going to try to carry it all which was definitly not going to work.

"Damn will you look on the ass on that girl! I would so tap that." I looked away. It wouldn't feel right checking out other girls when I was so close to being with Bella.

"You know she will probably drop something. Jake go over there and help her pick it up. Maybe she will give you her digits."

"No."

"Why are you afraid. Look man I'm paying for you to go to this movie and to go to the club. Just help her pick it up." I sighed defeated. I walked over and sure enough her popcorn fell. But then the strangest thing happened. I caught it and set it on the floor. It was like a reflex. I walked back to Quil and Embry.

"You didn't say I couldn't catch it before it fell." I said grabbing my ticket from Quil's hand and heading into the theater.

**Bella's POV**

I somehow managed to find Jessica and Angela in the dark room without spilling any more food.

"Hey, did you get everything alright?" Angela asked as I sat down in between them.

"Yeah." I said the popcorn scene flashing in my mind before the lights dimmed.

**(Fancy page break)**

The movie was hilarious. In the end the two killer exes fell in love got married and trained their kids to kill their exes. It sounds confusing but it was really funny.

"Ok so now what are we going to to with our last hour and a half?" I asked as we all piled into the car again.

"Well I know this great club. I always forget the name cause they keep changing it but I think it's called Red. Anyway they have hot guys and they have they best music ever."

"How old do we have to be?"

"21. We are all good though, they don't look at I.D. if you act the part."

"Ok well lets go. She started the car and we were off.

The line was hella long but we finally got in. We didn't have to show our I.D. just like Jessica said but we did have to walk down a million stairs before we actually got to the club. The lights in the club were red (obviously) but it set the mood. The music was hypnotic and I felt my foot tapping along to the beat. We walked over to the bar and sat down.

"So ummm what exactly do we do here?" I asked feeling stupid. I'm 18 and I've never been to a club. How embarrassing is that?

"Well you just dance and flirt with guys."_ But I don't want a guy I want Jacob._

"Oh. Okay." After we ordered our drinks a guy came up to Jessica and asked her if she wanted to dance. She looked at us and and then left with him. The same thing happened to Angela and before I knew it I was alone at the bar. Great.

**Jacob POV**

"Red? That's a weird name." I said as we waited in line. When we got to the front security gave us a once over and let us in. _That was easy_. Quil was immediately asked to dance by this girl with her boobs practically hanging out of her shirt. Embry and I made our way to the bar.

"So man how are things going with Bella?" He asked.

"Good. Okay. Cullen dumped her and I want to rip his head off. She's so amazing and I just don't get why he dumped her. I expected her to be all depressed but she's actually handling it really well. We've been uhh hanging out a little bit more."

"Just be careful man. You don't want her to be all into you an then Cullen comes back, she goes back to him, and you're screwed." I was about to tell him that she would never do that to me and to shut the hell up when a girl wearing nothing but a mini-skirt and the smallest tube top know to women walked up and asked Embry to dance. I was left alone at the bar. In a way I was happy. _Now I won't be tempted to do anything. _

I looked around. This was actually a pretty good club no matter how odd the name was. The service was great, the lighting really set the party mood, and they had a good music selection. The girls all looked like sluts though. After I had analyzed the room I started to look down the bar and saw the most unexpected thing...Bella Swan.

**Bella POV**

I was in the middle of trying to be invisible when a man sat down on the stool next to me. He looked like he was in his late 30's, had a 5 o'clock shadow, and his breath smelled like beer. He had raggedy clothes on and slurred his words as he ordered his drink. _Yup, definitely drunk._Once he got his drink he took a couple of deep sips from his beer before looking at me and smiling.

"Hhhhey there, how wwwwould you like to come home with me t-tonight." He slurred his eyes crossing a bit._ Somebody has had a little to much to drink._

_"_I'm fine thanks." Suddenly his hand was on my butt and I heard a ferocious growl in my head. _What the hell did I just grow? No you idiot it's Edward. You knew this was going to happen sometime. It just happened to be tonight._

"I wasn't asking." he said. I shoved him and quickly extracted myself from the seat and I left just as he fell over. I walked outside through the back door and started to make my way up a steep hill. _I guss that's why they have the stairs. _As I made my way up the hill I went past a little ally way filled with drunk guys. They were all passing around a pipe and beer when they saw me and started whistling at me.

_This is just not my day is it. Bella walk faster. _I was startled as Edward's voice entered my head._ Get the hell out of my head I don't need you! _I felt like a phyco screaming at a person that was in my head. _Oh, I am so going crazy. _I could hear the footsteps behind me and I began to run. Of course that did no good. I tripped and fell after the first hundred yards.

The boys gathered around me standing in a circle. "Well boys look like we've got ourselves a little runner. We don't much like runners do we?" the oldest one said looking at me with a horrid smirk on his face. "Nope we sure as hell don't." said one of then and they all nodded in agreement as they came closer. They picked me up and threw me into the nearest ally.I was frozen.

_This has got to be the worst night EVER! Oh my god I'm going to get raped and die!_ The fragile Bella screamed inside my head. _No we are not! We are not going to do this to Jacob. We are going to fight but if we aren't gonna fight for ourselves then we will don it for Jacob because he's worth fighting for._A stronger me retaliated. It sounded like we were in some war movie but it did motivate me. I took one deep breath and said ," Don't touch me you pigs." I am the police chief's daughter. You touch me and you'll be locked up forever." I said surprised by the feirceness in my voice. But it only made then angry.

One of then slapped me amd I whimpered. "We don't take threats to well sweetheart." he said his voice hard and controlled as if he was holding some of his anger back. I wonder why. He hit me in my chest. _He wants to have his anger to fuel him when he's beating you. Oh joy!_My head was bleeding from my fall and I could feel bruises forming. In one last attempt at freedom I kicked one of the guys in his uhh...area. He went down and I got up and started to run. The guys started to chase after me. I screamed right before they took me down. The leader led a knife to my neck. _Who knew Port Angeles could be this shady. _I thought I was about to give up all hope when I saw something or rather someone that lifted my spirits...Jacob Black.

**Jacob POV**

_Bella! I can't believe she's here! What's she doing in a club? Well she looks just as miserable as I do so she must have been dragged here as well._ I was just about to get up and talk to her when some creep slid into the stool next to her obviously drunk. I felt my anger flare. _Jake calm down he's just sitting next to her. _I sit back down in the stool and wait until he moves. HE gets his drink and he looks like hes about to get up when he turns to Bella.

I can't hear over the music but I don't have to to know he's flirting._ It's fine Bella would never take intrest in a creep like him._ I told my self this over and over again and I was starting to calm down. When I knew I was calm enough I looked up and saw him grab her butt._ THAT'S IT! _I jumped out of the stool and made my way towards the other end of the bar ready to rip his arms off but Bella beat me to the punch. She shoved him off of her and went out through the back door.

I went over to the drunk man. He was passed out on the floor. I would have beat the shit out of him then and there if I wasn't completely disgusted with him. He was at least ten years older than Bella and he was hitting on her. He had a putrid stench and he needed to shave. his raggedy clothes were filthy and his hair was a mess. He deserved to just lay there on the floor for the whole night. I stepped over him and followed Bella out the back door.

I scanned the area for her but I couldn't see her. That worried me and I started to walk up the hill. About 5 minutes later I heard a whimper and a gruff cold voice. " We don't take threats very well sweetheart." I started to walk faster when I heard a grunt and saw Bella running off up the hill until the night swallowed her figure. I heard a scream and then I started to run.

When they came in sight I was infuriated by what I saw. One of the men held Bella down at knife point. I sprinted towards them.

**Bella POV**

"Jacob." I breathed and all of the guys looked up. _No! No he can't put himself in danger what if he..._even in my thoughts I couldn't say anything referring to Jacob dying in any way. Jake moved forward in a slow, predatory way. "What you want some of this? Bring it!" One of the guys said pulling out a knife. But Jake just kept coming forword. When he was 10 yards away I could see the anger in his eyes and those dark brown resentful eyes were trained on his prey.

"Step away from her." He said in a low animalistic tone. Nobody moved. "NOW!" he growled. The men backed up except for the one with the knife. Jake took this as a challenge and lunged for him. He tried to throw the knife but his aim was marred by his fear and he was way off target hitting one of his own men.

Before I knew what was happening Jake was beating the living day lights out of him. All of the men were terrified and scattered. The only ones left in the ally were me, Jake and the guy he was beating the shit out of. As I looked at the man I realized I couldn't let him continue. Jake was so sweet and he wasn't an animal. At least not for a few days.

I got up slowly wincing in pain and went over to Jake. His arm ws swung back ready to punch again but I put my arm on his shoulder. I saw the anger melt from his eyes as our eyes locked. He relaxed and got up. We both went back into the club holding hands. I told Jessica that I was leaving and she eyed Jake.

He didn't notice because he was staring at me. Then I noticed that she was dancing with some one different. She was dancing with Quil. Angela popped up and she was dancing with Embry. _What the hell? _I looked at Jacob and he was mirroring my expression. "What?" They both asked. Jacob just shook his head and turned to Jessica. " Would you mind taking them home. Just take them to the reservation and they could walk the rest of the way." Jessica's face lit up. " I don't think that will be a problem. Have fun Bella." she said and I blushed. Jacob and I walked out of the club and went to Billy's truck. Once we were both in the car we just sat there for a couple minutes drinking in the events that had just occurred.

I looked over at Jake and there was pain in his eyes.

"Jake what's wrong?"

"I was ready to kill him Bella. I was so angry and I just lost control."

"You saved my life Jake. And you didn't kill him. It's naturally for people to loose their temper but-"

"No you don't understand. I didn't loose my temper. I lost myself. I couldn't control by body. It was like I was watching me beat up somebody from outside my body all the time screaming 'STOP'. "He said looking down but I grabbed his chin and brought his eyes to mine.

"I know some times you might think that you won't be able to control yourself, that you will lose yourself. And I know you don't need me to tell you this but I always will, you're not going to loose yourself. No matter what happens this," I said pointing to his heart, "will stay the same, and you will always be my Jacob. And that is all that matters." When I was talking we never broke eye contact and my voice was soft but stern. I looked into his deep brown eyes and realized how close our faces were. _Kiss me, kiss me, kiss me, oh please kiss me. No you kiss him. It makes you seem more independent and strong. I can't kiss him I'm supposed to be comforting him and what about Edward? Jake is just a friend. No he isn't! Edward is my one true love. No Jake is! Edward! Jake! SHUT UP! I am going insane. I should be put in a straight jacket and a nice spongy room._ Because of my confusion I backed up and Jake started the engine.

_You idiot why can't you just stay out of my head and go back to my heart! _I screamed at my feelings._Well actually your feelings are controlled by your brain so technically this is where I am supposed to be. Well then just leave me alone because I am going to be with Jake. You can't what about Edward? He is your soul mate. No Jake is my soul mate. He is the one I am supposed to be with. But Edward can give you everything you ever wanted. That's not true, he can't give me a normal life. Oh, and you think wolf boy over there can? Yes I do. He's my sun . And Edward is your moon. The sun is more important. Without the moon the world would be thrown into a state of shock and chaos but without the sun everything would die. Whatever, Edward would be dissapointed. Let him be disappointed he's the one that left._ I tapped out of my mental conversation just as we pulled into my house. Jake got out of the car to open my door.

_Edward used to do that. Shut up._ Jake opened my door and I stepped out." Bella. What's wrong honey?"Jake said his voice filled with concern "Nothing." " Then why are you crying?" _Because I can't control my stupid emotions and when you came to open the door it reminded me of Edward and I'm crazy. _"I just..I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there tonight Jake." _Good cover up._He pulled me into a tight hug. "Bells I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there to stop me. But I am so glad that you didn't get... I just don't know if I would have been able to stop my self from killing them." He said, his voice muffled because his head was in my hair. He kissed my forehead. _This is it! You gotta do it!_

I looked up and saw that his eyes were burning with different emotions. There was hope, anger, pain, and love. He started to lean in and I followed suit. Here we were, standing in my drive way, our faces a few inches apart. I could see our breath mixing in the cold night air. " Bella." Jake whispered before our lips touched. My world was on fire. It was filled with Jake and only Jake. Our kiss started off sweet. It was innocent and small but it quickly grew like a wildfire. My hands went around his neck and I pulled him closer as he placed his hands at the small of my back and held me even closer to his body. His hands slid up and down my back and I tangled my hands in his hair. I loved how he kissed me. It wasn't full of lust but it wasn't short like Edward's. It was sweet but passionate. Hist tongue traced my bottom lip and I allowed him entrance. I felt his tongue cautiously enter my mouth. Soon we had a rhythm going. Our lips would come together and our tongues would dance and then we would break apart before repeating the process. I was in heaven. Jacob's strong arms were around me and his mouth was moving against mine in a heated kiss. I didn't know how long it had been when we pulled apart. Jacob came back and pecked my lips three times in the sweetest way before looking at me.

"Wow." I whispered. "That was-" "Amazing." he interjected. "It was." he said smiling. He led me to the door and gave me a sweet short kiss before I turned and opened the door. To my surprise I was home 5 minutes early. I took a shower and went to bed only thinking about that kiss we had shared.

**Jacob POV**

_I kissed her I just kissed Bella and she kissed me back!_I laughed as I drove back home it was a minute to midnight and I still had 5 minutes minimum to get home but I didn't care if I was late. Cause I kissed her! I can't believe the turn this night took. My laughter faltered as I think about the man I almost killed. What would I have done if I did kill him? I didn't mean for it to go that far. I just couldn't stop. It was like something had taken over my body and I just couldn't control it anymore. I could only watch. I felt my hands hitting his flesh but I couldn't stop myself. I was an animal.

I shivered at the memory and I pulled into the driveway. I was 4 minutes late. Not to bad. _I was 4 minutes late cause I was kissing Bella._I reminded myself and smiled. Remembering the feel of her lips on mine, her hand in my hair, and her body so close to mine as our tongues and mouths moved together. The look of her soft warm face and the feel of her arms around my neck... I walked in and found Billy right at the door not looking to happy.

"You're 4 minutes late."

"Dad it was just 4 minutes." I said smiling. That threw him off.

"Why are you so happy?"

"Because I just kissed Bella and she kissed me back." I said making my way up the stairs leaving him speechless. But somehow I knew he was smiling. I showerd and made my way to bed and plunged into sweet dreams about my Bella.

**I hoped you liked it! This is the longest chapter I have ever written for any of my stories so I hope it's not long and crappy cause that would suck. Again sorry if it's not fluffy enough but I wasn't really in the mood. Please REVIEW and tell me what you think. THen next tory I will update will be Redeem. Oh and once again there is nothing wrong with being gay. OK REVIEW!...plz.**

**ladybug82896**

**TTFN! :D**


	7. And So It Begins

**Well I'm back! I haven't updated in forever. Well that should change because two of my stories are coming to a close with only one or two chapters left, which will give me more time to update this story and Redeem. I'm sorry if the dialogue between Bella's "feelings" and her "mind" is hard to read, but it really seemed like a waste to put a space in between everything they say. I tried to make it so you could tell which was which by what comments they made. And in the other chapters I only used the "angel devil" thing so you could tell which side Bella favored. The voices in her head are really her "feelings" and her "mind", not an angel and a devil. I just wanted to clear that up. Well I really wasn't sure what would happen in this chapter and then it hit me that …well why don't you just read and find out. Enjoy!**

**Oh My God**

**Bella's POV**

I woke up the next morning completely rejuvenated. I was jubilant. I had shared a steamy kiss with Jacob Black! I didn't know what would happen and quite frankly I didn't care. I would fight for Jacob no matter what. There was no if, ands, or butts about it. I loved Jacob Black. I want to shout it out loud and let the world hear it. The last time I was the reason things couldn't work out between us, and now that I decided not to be an ignorant bitch and push him away, maybe we can be together. I heard my alarm ring beside me. Ugh. I totally forgot about school. Oh well, at least it's Friday. I rolled out of bed and made my way towards the bathroom. My hair is a mess, my face has a little dried drool on it, and my face has a bunch of crap on it. Sometimes I really miss looking perfect all the time. But I can deal with my crappy mediocre self for a heartbeat and for Jacob. I thought of our kiss while I washed my face and brushed my hair. (The paleness I could do nothing about.) Once I looked somewhat presentable I sat grabbed an apple and downed some orange juice before leaving. On the ride over I tested myself once more, and turned on the radio. I found that the more I listened to it the less pain I felt. I still felt the pain though. My "feelings" for Edward weren't giving up. _You kissed Jacob! Oh my god this is amazing! What's going to happen with you two? Well really what does it matter? Finally we can be together._ Is what my mind would say. _Are you crazy? You kissed your best friend? He is two years younger than you! Have you lost it? And what was that last night? How could you make fun of the one person you truly love? Well they had a point last night. I mean what straight guy goes around looking perfect all the time? Perfect hair, perfect shoes, and perfect clothes. Alice does that to all of them. You know how she is. So what! A real man would stand up to his _sister_ and tell her to leave him be. And I highly doubt Alice sits Edward down, picks out his clothes, picks out his shoes, and does his hair. He is what 110 years old? Why doesn't he grow a pair and stand up to her. Well...he... that just shows how kind he is. Oh that's bullshit and you know it. Stop cursing god damn it! You just cursed. So you made me mad. You know what just shut up! You shut up! _"Shut up!" I screamed when I finally had enough. I was in the parking lot and that little outburst granted me a few looks but I didn't care. I was fed up with this crap. Stupid old man not telling me everything. _Well he did give you a second chance with Jacob. Any objection in there? No. Although I don't like it, I will admit that that old man did give you a second chance with that dog. Well that's only because she wasn't happy with a cock sucker. Ha-ha very funny. You are so juvenile. _

I got out of my truck and started to head to my English class when I was intercepted by Lauren. "Look, I'm just gonna cut to the chase here. I didn't appreciate you embarrassing me at lunch the other day, I didn't appreciate you not inviting me to your little "girl's night out", and I sure as hell don't appreciate you flirting with Mike." I turned around to face her. "Well first of all _Lauren_, you don't need me to embarrass you. You embarrass yourself by flashing your boobs in front of every guys face, and making desperate attempts for attention that grant you nothing but a reputation as the Forks High school slut. Second, I didn't invite you because I don't like you. If you couldn't figure that out then your dumber than I thought. And lastly, I did not, nor will I ever flirt with Mike. I already have someone I like so you can just back off. Leave me alone because I'm tired of your bullshit!" She looked like I had just slapped her in the face. I wish I had, but instead I walked into the class room. I felt everyone's eyes on me as I went to my seat. Obviously they had heard my conversation with Lauren. I scanned the room. Thank god Mike wasn't here yet. I didn't want to seem bitchy by saying that I would never flirt with him, but it was the truth. I felt someone sit down in the seat next to me. I looked over to find Mike smiling.

"Hey Mike." I said, not wanting to be rude.

"Hey Bella." He replied. For some unknown reason his smile grew. I went through English, Math, Spanish and my free period before going to lunch. I was dreading lunch, because going to lunch meant sitting with Lauren, and I was really not in the mood to deal with her shit. However, my stomach would be mad at me if I didn't eat, seeing as it was already empty because of my tiny breakfast. I went to the cafeteria and got my lunch. It was ravioli with a bread stick, along with a water bottle and a piece of fruit. I sat down at the usual table and found everyone sitting there, and when I say everyone I mean _everyone. _Lauren glared at me from across the table. "So Bella, Mike here tells me that you said Edward broke up with you." I looked at Mike. I did tell him that. Damn. "No I didn't. I said that I broke up with him and he said that he was fine with it because long distance relationships didn't really turn out well." Mike's everlasting smile dimmed a little bit before coming right back. Lauren narrowed her eyes. Mike saw the tension and decided to intervene. "So, Bella we thought that we would have a bonfire tonight. Want to come?" I glanced at Lauren who was staring daggers at me. I smirked inwardly. _That's right bitch. He asked __me__._ "Sure." I said. I glanced at Jessica and my eyes softened. I knew she liked Mike. Even though it would give me so much pleasure to ask Mike if we could go alone and make Lauren feel horrible, I couldn't do it for three reasons. One it would be bad for me because I don't really like Mike, two it would make me no better than Lauren, and three it would hurt Jessica. I turned to Jess and Angela." Who all is coming?" "Well I umm... thought just you and me would..." "You said "we thought we would have a bonfire". So I just want to know who the "we" is." Mike's smile fell. "Well I guess everyone can come." He said, not nearly as enthusiastic as before. "Okay! But I need someone to pick me up. Mike, would you mind?" Jessica asked. I smiled. Better Jess than Lauren. "Sure Jessica." "I need-" Lauren began, but the bell rang. We all got up and went to our classes. I looked back and found her seething. I smirked and walked out and headed towards biology. Ugh, biology.

I opened the door and sat down in my seat. Of course the seat next to me was empty. My chest burned and I felt that stupid hole in my chest. _Go away! No! She needs to feel this. To understand that Edward is what she needs. She doesn't need that stupid mutt. She does need Jacob. He's the one that helped last time when Eddie went away. Or don't you remember? Do you not remember the pain that she felt. How she walked around like a zombie for months not talking to anyone. How her self confidence had been completely drained from her! Do you not remember the pain Edward caused. I... he did it because he loved her. Bull shit! You don't do that to someone you love. Jake loves her. He fixed her when she was broken, he stuck around when she didn't want him because he knew she needed him, and he never gave her up because he felt like she couldn't make her own decisions. Well... Well nothing! Go away because we don't need you and we don't need Edward. _There were no more voices and class was over. I was shaking in my seat from the inner conversation I just had. I got up and walked to P.E. and felt sick. Being at war within yourself really takes a toll on you. Somehow I made it through P.E. and ran to my truck when the final bell rang. I ran into Mike right before I could make it into the car. "So, Bella I told the other girls that we are going to First Beach at 7:00. That a good time for you?" he asked. I could tell he was trying to "dazzle" me as Edward had. Don't get me wrong he was quite charming, but he wasn't what I wanted. "Yeah that's fine." I replied turning to get into my truck when he blocked me. "Hey Bella do you want me to give you a ride? I'm sure Jessica wouldn't mind if I gave you the front and she took the back." _Oh yes she would. _"I'm good Mike. I have a truck." I said patting the door of my truck lovingly before climbing inside. I saw him frowning as I drove away. It was 6:00 when I had finished my shift at Urban Outfitters. Luckily Mike and I had different shifts today so I wouldn't be bothered by him. When I got home I went to my closet and fished out some boyfriend jeans and a blue long sleeve shirt. I put a black sweatshirt on over my shirt and went to the bathroom to bush my hair before leaving. I had 15 minutes to get there. On the drive there I started to think about Jake, yet again.

_Should I invite him to the bonfire? Would they mind? Well Jessica and Angela wouldn't mind but Mike might. Screw Mike. _I took out my phone and texted Jake.

_**Hey there's a bonfire tonight at First Beach. Want 2 come? ~B**_

_**Sure thing Bells. What time? ~JB**_

_**It starts at 7. I'm 15 minutes away now. ~B**_

_**Alright I'll c u there. ~JB**_

_**K ~B**_

It was a short conversation because I was driving. I already had enough problems; I didn't need to get in an accident. I couldn't help but wonder if I should say "I love you" or what. Were we an item? Would he mind if I called him my boyfriend? Questions, questions. I hope Mike will behave himself. If he doesn't I will not stop Jake from beating the shit out of him. I pulled up to First Beach and stepped out of my truck. I was immediately lifted into a huge hug. I turned around and I saw my Jacob grinning. "You made I-" I was cut off by his lips. The kiss was so sweet and playful. We separated before his lips caught mine again. This time I put my arms around his neck. I felt his hands wind around my waist and his tongue touch my own. He sensually moved his tongue over mine before removing it and pulling back. I was at loss for words. _Bella, how did you ever live without this? _Jake looked at me and smiled. "Sorry I just had to do that and it would not be polite if I did it in front of your friends. I've been thinking about out kiss all day." "Me too. And don't ever, and I mean EVER apologize for kissing me like that." He smiled and we started to walk towards the beach. He took my hand in his, and as we walked I told him about my friends. "Well Jessica is sort of the typical high school girl. She's pretty, preppy, smart, and hilarious. She has brown hair and brown eyes. Angela is a little more quiet. She is very sweet, and is always helpful. She's on our school newspaper so she almost always has her camera with her. She may seem a little shy at first but she is actually really funny. She has brown curly hair and brown eyes." I looked at him. I could tell he was listening and I smiled. "Mike is on the football team. He has blond hair and blue eyes. He almost always flirts with me even though I shoot him down all the time, and he can't tell when a girl likes him. I say this because Jessica likes him and he doesn't know a thing. And Lauren, well Lauren's a bitch." He laughed and gave me a kiss on the cheek just as we came in sight of the fire. Everyone was there. Mike, Jessica, Angela, Ben, Eric, and to my disappointment Lauren. I don't know who told Eric and Ben but I'm glad they were there.

My cheeks turned red when I realized that they were all looking at Jacob. "Hey umm this is Jacob. I hope you don't mind." "We don't mind at all." Lauren said looking Jacob up and down. I balled my hands into fists and felt my anger rise. Did she not see us come together, or him kiss me on the cheek. "That's Jessica, Angela, Ben, Mike, Eric, and I'm Lauren." She batted her eyelashes. What the fuck? Bitch. I narrowed my eyes and Jacob squeezed my hand. "Nice to meet you all." he said before sitting down. I saw Lauren get up so I quickly sat down beside him. She glared at me and I glared right back. Jake put his arm around my waist, claiming me and I put my head on his chest. I loved everything about Jacob. His looks, his personality, how he made me feel about myself, everything. His warmth spread through me, wait. He was getting hotter. He would change soon. Not tonight but maybe in a couple of days. I sighed. I was going to miss this Jake. The human one was so, innocent. He could get mad and not burst out of his skin, he was happy this way. Of course I knew that he would be happy after he got used to being a wolf, but the weeks after his change would be unbearable for him. But at least this time I can be there to help him. Maybe I can set it up again. Yeah I can ask him if he wants to go to the movies tomorrow and I can stage it again, but this time I'm going to go home with him. This could actually work. My thoughts were interrupted by Jacob. "What are you thinking about Bells?" "Nothing, I'll tell you later. Maybe we can take a walk." Just as he was about to answer Lauren spoke up. "Jake could you help me with this ice chest. The drinks are getting warm." Jake gave me a sympathetic look. "Yeah, we can take a walk later." He said before giving me a quick kiss on the cheek and going to help Lauren. I didn't miss Lauren and Mike's scowl at the gesture. Jake went and picked up the chest, filling the drink chest with more ice, and setting the ice chest back in its place once more. All the while Lauren was behind him sizing him up. Looking at his ass and then to his strong arms and down to his uhum parts. I was so fucking mad. I wanted to stick her head in the fire. The only thing that saved me was Angela. She started the conversations.

"So Bella how did you do on Mrs. Baker's English test? You know the one on Romeo and Juliet." I gave her a smile, silently thanking her. "I got an A. What about you?" "Same. What about you Jess?" "Oh my god she gave me a fucking B. I only missed part of the essay question and she knocks me down a whole letter grade! I mean what the fuck is that?" "That is messed!" Angela and I said at about the same time. "I know!" Mike added." She gave me a C- because I didn't use enough commentary in my essay." "I got an A." Ben and Eric said. "I got the worst grade here then. I got a D because I was absent on the day we read the final chapter. She said I should have read it at home even though I was sick! I was asleep for pretty much the whole day." Lauren didn't say anything. She was still trying to get Jake to look at her. Mike took out the food and we ate while talking. Angela got her camera and started snapping pictures while we kept up the conversations, talking about different things. Even Jake got in on the fun. Of course he made everyone laugh by embarrassing me. "I remember once when we were four Bella and Charlie slept over. Bella came into my room at two in the morning screaming "The moon! It's getting bigger! We're all going to die! Ahhhh help me Jake!" before crawling under my bed. I had to coax her out and convince her that we weren't all going to die!" Everyone started laughing and I slapped Jacob's arm. "Well at least I didn't start crying when my doll got lost in the ocean. And then say "It's just not the same!" when my dad got another one!" "It was not a _doll_ it was an action figure." "Sure sure." Jake just laughed and held me tighter. I felt his simile in my hair. "So, how long have you and Bella know each other?" Jess asked with a mischievous gleam in her eye. She was matchmaking again. Well at least this time it was with someone I liked. She had tried a couple days ago with Ryan and Joseph in our homeroom. They were nice guys, but they weren't Jacob. "We've know each other since we were little. We've always been close." Jake answered, looking at me. "Oh really?"Jess said looking at me before turning to talk to Angela.

Everyone was talking to someone else except for Lauren, who was looking intently at Jacob. He noticed and leaned in and whispered," How about that walk?" I smiled. "Sure thing." I said and we got up. Everyone was immersed in their conversations so they didn't notice us leaving. Well everyone except for Lauren. We walked over a little hill to our tree and sat down. We could still see the camp and they could see us if they looked hard enough. "So." Jake said. "So... what do you think of my friends?" "They're cool. Jessica is what you'd expect like you said. She seems like the cheerleader type. Angela is just as sweet as you said she would be, and you were right about her having her camera all the time. Ben, Tyler, and Eric are really cool. I wouldn't mind hanging out with them. Mike, well I saw the way he looked at you, and I don't like it. He needs to get it in his head that you are taken. You are mine Ms. Swan." He said reaching up to caress my cheek before giving me a small kiss. I say small because it was small in length but not in passion. Every kiss we shared was electric, no matter how short or how long. We pulled back and he pulled me tight into his arms. I had to ask now. It was the perfect moment. "Jacob, am I... would I be considered your ummm your... girlfriend?" his smile melted away and he blushed. "Well Bells I... kinda thought you already were." he said scratching behind his head. "Well you hadn't asked so I just, I didn't know." Now it was my turn to blush. We shared a moment of silence, and then out of nowhere Jacob got down on two knees. "Wha-" "Well since proposing is one knee, I thought that asking you to be my-" "Hey guys, you're missing the party!" Lauren interrupted us. I was red with anger. I was about to go off on her when Jacob put his hand on my knee from where he was sitting. He got up and sat on the log next to me. "Hi Lauren." "Hey, mind if I join you?" "Well actually-" "Great, thanks Bella. Hey Jacob can you scoot over?" "There's really not that much room." I said, glaring at her. "Oh well then Jacob would you mind if I sat in your lap?" She said grinning. "No, no Jacob is our guest. Why don't you come sit on my lap?" She grimaced and looked me up and down. "Bella I would have never guessed you were like that. Based on the fact that you went out with Cullen." I felt the hole burn in my chest as she continued. "But then again he did leave you didn't he. I know he did Bella. You know why? Because he finally realized what a plain, flat chested, cold hearted, bitch you are. You didn't deserve him. He should have been with a real woman. Some one that could give him everything when we all know that you can't. So why don't you take your plain white ass and go elsewhere." My heart felt like it had just shriveled up and dropped from my chest to my stomach. I felt the water gathering behind my eyes threatening to spill over. I replayed her words in my head over and over again within a matter of seconds, letting them resonate. And then the most surprising thing happened. I got angry. I felt my adrenaline pumping through my veins fueling my anger. I felt my heart come alive and beat faster. I was angry. I was hurt. And I was one bad ass bitch... at least that's how I felt at the moment. I saw Jacob about to retaliate; I could tell he was angry. I put my hand on his shoulder and I stood up before getting in her face.

"Lauren you are the last person that should be talking about guy problems. The guy you like doesn't even notice you so you forget about him until it's convenient for you to peruse him again. You accuse me of being a bitch when you come over here insulting me, while trying to take away the one person that might actually love me on the whole god damned planet! You throw yourself at hundreds of guys because you think that it will make you popular. That people will know you've become a woman because you've had sex with a bunch of guys. I may be flat chested and plain. I may not have the popularity that you _think_ you have. But I know that I have respect. I know that every guy doesn't expect me to give him my body because I don't have the reputation of the school SLUT! At least I have my dignity. At least I'm not a whore!" "I am not a whore!" She protested. "But you like to do it, we've all heard the song! I mean you do another guy every night and for what? What do you get out of it. You obviously don't care much for him because you're with a different guy the next night so why do you do it. Do you just need a release? Do you just want people to know that whenever they need a release you're the one to call? I mean really Lauren why don't you start naming your price for your services. You could have your own little corner to work at school and everything. You might even get some regulars. At least that would be close to love right?" I was surprised by how hostile I was being. "I get love every night. More than you'll ever get!" "That is not love Lauren. That is sex. That is trashy, dirty, one night stand, booty call sex! You have no worth to those guys. You talk about me getting left how about you. You get left every day and you bounce right back up. What, do you not care that these guys don't want you anymore after one night? That they use and objectify your body because you let them!" "You make me sound like a prostitute!" _Nooo really?_ "Keep going down this road and I know I'll see you in Port Angeles in an alley way when driving by in a couple of years. When that happens you just remember this moment. You remember how guys just gave you up after one night because you weren't worth their time. Remember everything I said tonight. Because when I see you in that alley way I'm going to shake my head in pity and keep on going. So keep at it. Keep letting guys take what they want. Keep letting them take your body. Keep letting them treat you like shit. They don't five a shit about you. No one does."

I saw hurt flash across her face, but it did not linger there. "It hurt when he left you didn't it. I know because I remember the look on your face. That's why you are insulting me. Because you are trying to cover up the pain just like you tried to cover up the fact that you got left. So how did it feel Bella? How did it feel to know that you weren't good enough for him? That you couldn't be what he needed. That he had to make some excuse just to get away from you. Because a real man like Edward wants someone like me. That can stand up and give it to them when they need it. Not someone like you. A meek, nerdy, flat, poor, fragile girl that can't do anything for him. He threw you out like the piece of trash you are. When he comes back I'm going to give him a little treat." I felt my anger flare. I saw red. Both my mind and my feelings wanted to beat the shit out of her. "I'm going to undress him and worship him in _every _way. I can't wait till he comes back so I can taste his nice big-" I didn't give her a chance to finish her sentence. Before I knew what I was doing I pulled back my arm and punched her square in the mouth. I saw Jacob get up, but I wasn't done yet. I let loose my fury, my vengeance, and my pain on her. I let all of my emotions go. This was so much better than walking around like a zombie. I felt empowered, so I kept at it. I punched and kicked with more ferocity than I thought I had. She fought back of course, but she only slapped me a couple times and scratched me with her fake hooker nails. I felt Jacob pull me away and the others came from the fire. I was kicking in Jacob's arms but I was calming down. Lauren was a bloody mess. Her nose was bleeding like crazy and was a little crooked, she had a huge bruise forming on her eye. She was... missing a tooth! Damn I am good! We hadn't even been fighting that long and I knocked her tooth out. She was rolling in the sand reaching out and grabbing air screaming, "Let me at her! I can take that bitch! She thinks she can beat me? Oh hell no!" She said this while swinging at an imaginary me. "I think it's time for us to go." Jacob said before we walked back to the truck.

We drove to Jacob's house because it was closer and because I think my dad would be a little worried if I came home with blood all over me. Especially because it wasn't my blood. The ride to Jake's house was quiet. We got to his house in about two minutes and he helped me out of the truck. He unlocked the door and went to go get me some clothes for me. Once again this was in silence. His silence was starting to worry me. He was probably disappointed in me. I know what Edward would have said. _"Bella how could you have been so reckless? You could have been hurt! You were hurt, you're bleeding! Bella you can't come to La Push anymore it's too dangerous. I need to be with you every second of every day nag nag nag nag nag!" Well that was bitchy. Edward wasn't that bad. _I thought to myself. _Well I'm in a bitchy mood and he was always treating me like a child instead of a girlfriend. He wasn't that bad though. He was! Now please be quiet. Oh now you're nice. I said SHUT THE FUCK UP! Never mind. _I was so irritated, but I could feel bad as Bella slowly being prodded back into her cage. Jacob came back down holding a sweat shirt. He handed them to me before he sat down next to me. "Thanks." I said meekly. There was more silence. We sat there and I finally couldn't take it anymore. "Jacob look I'm sorry I just couldn't take it anymore. I'm sorry I got in a fight I just I don't know what came over me." I looked at him with pleading eyes. He looked irritated still. "Bells don't apologize. I'm proud of you. You stood up for yourself like you should have. I'm glad you punched her. I have never seen you like that. You were amazing." "Then why do you look pissed off?" Because of Lauren's bitching. She hurt you and she ruined my night with you. It has nothing to do with you, I promise. She just... those things she said about you they just..." He started to shake slightly. I could see the wolf starting to kick in, but when I put my hand on his cheek I could tell he wasn't ready to phase yet. He didn't have a high enough temperature yet. He stopped shaking as soon as my hand touched his cheek. He pulled me onto his lap slowly, and I moved my legs so I was straddling him. We leaned in and brushed lips slightly and pulled away. I could feel his warm breath on my lips. I pushed my hands into his long black hair and pulled him closer. My forehead was leaning on his. Our lips caught again for a short time. Every time we kissed the kisses got deeper, like the striking of a match. Finally our lips migrated together and the fire caught. The soft, slow burning fire consumed us. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't think about anything I just felt. For the first time I was feeling. My mind was blank, letting my body move on its own accord. My hands snaked around his neck and I buried my hands into his hair. I was going to miss his long hair after he cut it. His hands wrapped around my waist and drew slow circles on my back. This feeling was great, but I wanted more. So I gave him another open mouthed kiss and sucked on his lip. He moaned and I felt his hands go under my shirt. They inched away from my back and towards my breasts, and that's when the trouble started.

Up until now it had just been an inner monologue that goaded me towards breaking down and missing Edward, from keeping Jake at a distance. It was hard, but I knew that I would be able to fight it. Well I guess my feelings just weren't having that because instead of a voice telling me to stop my head filled with images. Images of Edward and me. When I had climbed on his back and he ran with me, our first kiss, our first time, our first Christmas together, college, and finally Edward leaving me in the woods. That was the last image, and it remained in my head. I started crying and Jacob pulled away. I couldn't handle it. This was the first time that I actually felt like giving up and waiting for Edward. _All of the memories would stop, as well as the voices. You could be happy with Edward. You were before you left. You can have that. Just wait for Edward to come back. Edward is what you need. Those moments are what are most precious to you._ It would be easy. I could just wait for Edward to come back. I could go cliff diving and he would come back sooner. I could- "Bella?" Jacob's voice brought me from my thoughts. "Bella honey I'm sorry I don't know what happened. I just lost control. It was so amazing. Are you okay, I didn't mean to, god Bella say something!" My mouth opened but no words came out. Instead of trying to speak, which was clearly not going to work, I lay my head on his shoulder and started to cry. I cried about everything. Jacob, Edward, what Lauren had said to me, how I messed everything up by not picking Jacob in the very beginning, how much I want to give up even though I know Edward could never fulfill me. I cried and cried and cried until I had no more tears. And Jake just held me through it all. He didn't say a word. He didn't keep asking me ridiculous questions such as, ' Are you okay?' like Edward did. I mean seriously, I'm bawling here! Do I l_ook_ like I'm okay?

I immersed myself in Jacob's natural warmth and smiled. Jake saw that I was done crying, but he still didn't say anything. He was waiting for me to explain and was going to let me do it when I was good and ready. I love how he knew me so well. _I could never leave him._ I would go to hell and back to get Jacob. He is my everything. He is my sun, my air, and without him everything would be gone. There would be no true happiness. Because who could be happy in a sunless world. In an eternal night where there is only a moon. The moon is only there to balance the world. It does not bring happiness, but romance, and order. So my conscience was right. Edward does fulfill me, but Jacob completes me and brings me happiness. Who in their right mind would give up something like that? I think about the story Romeo and Juliet and how I used to think Jacob was Paris. Paris was the right choice because he loved Juliet, but she did not love him. She loved Romeo. The one that filled her life with jubilance and laughter as well as intense love. I now see that I was wrong. Edward is my Paris, while Jacob is my true Romeo. I could not leave him. I took a deep breath and decided to tell him partly the truth. Since the whole "back in time thing" might scare him off, and I did not want that. "I'm sorry I just. I was thinking about how much I love you. I love you so much it hurts, I mean it really hurts." He smiled his perfect Jacob smile. "I love you too Bells." he said, still waiting for me to continue. "I'm just a little scared is all. I loved Edward that way and he left me." I felt a single tear roll down my cheek. _Damn it where do I get all of these tears from. I mean was I always this much of a cry baby?_ "I just, I don't want you to leave me. I mean I trust you Jake, I do. But I, I don't know, I just start thinking about what would happen if you chose to leave me."I said my voice cracking. "Bells, I would never leave you like he did. I love you. I feel so alone when you're not with me Bella. I couldn't leave you without hurting myself in the process. But when you're with me... when you're with me I feel like I can do anything. You make me feel like I am a super hero "Something_ like that._ I thought before I realized that that's pretty much what Edward said to me. I know the real reason he did left, but I needed to keep up pretenses. And I was still pretty pissed about him leaving me. It hurts when the one person you thought loved you, leaves you, and then lies about it because he doesn't trust you to make choices in your relationship. _Well I can see that you're not thinking about quitting anymore. _Said my mind. _Hmph. Well at least I tried. _Said my feelings. I put on my best sad face and let my feelings overtake me. "That's what he said. And then he left me there! In the woods for crying out loud! What did I do? Why would he- and without giving me a reason! Oh well I guess that's a lie. He did tell me that I wasn't good enough for him. But why did it take him so long to figure it out? Why would he do this to me! I- ugh stupid tears!" I said wiping my face angrily. It did surprise me when I felt the tears coming but my feelings were very strong, and for once I was using it to my advantage. I know what I had said was a bunch of crap, but this is what I had felt like saying when he left me the first time. Jacob took my hand away from my face and slowly wiped away my tears with his thumb. He brushed my hair behind me ear an gave me a small kiss under my earlobe before whispered, "Bells, Edward is a pathetic excuse for a man if he can give you up. I mean what kind of person would give you up like he did?" He pulled away from my ear and looked me straight in the eye. "I'm sorry he had to hurt you like this Bella. I'm sorry he didn't care about you like you should have been cared for. And I'm sorry that you have to go through this pain. I wish you could be happy again, that you wouldn't be plagued with painful memories. And I know I can't do much about the memories you have, but I can make new ones for you, for us. I can give you the best memories, if we can be together. I know that you will always love Edward on some level, but do you think it is possible that one day you will be able to put Edward in the back of your mind? I'm not blaming you Bella. I know it's hard for you right now, and all I want to do is help you right now. I know you can't give me your whole heart yet, so I'm not asking for it. All I need is your love and I'm set. If you want to slow down, tell me. I will never pressure you to do anything you don't want to do. Trust me Bells, and in return I will always be there for you and give you my heart, body, mind, and soul. I will love you, and I will be here for you until you order me away. And even then I'll peruse you and beg for you to take me back. It is impossible for me to fall out of love of you, and even more impossible for me to stop loving you. Does that make sense?" I looked up at him. I hate this drama! I didn't ask for all of this. When I moved to Forks I was not expecting all of this! I mean damn! I'm surprised I haven't gone crazy yet. Without Jacob, I think I might have. But will I ever be able to get rid of these feelings for Edward and put him in the back of my mind. I mean really, would this ever go away? Could I live with it forever if it doesn't? "Bells." I realized I hadn't answered yet. "I know exactly what you mean Jacob. And I hope that I can put Edward in the back of my mind someday. But Jacob you do have my heart. You have my everything." He smiled and gave me a light kiss before looking at his watch and frowning. "Uhhh Bells, I think you better go. I don't want Charlie to hate me. I'm already dating his daughter; I don't need to push it." He smiled. I sighed and got off of him. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He walked me to my car. I didn't want to say goodbye, because I was scared that, without Jacob, the visions would come back. And without him there, I wasn't sure I would be able to take the painful memories. I pulled him into a kiss. I wanted something to remember when I felt like giving up tonight so, I prolonged the union of our lips by giving him a little tongue. His hands wound around my waist, but went no further. I guess he was a little nervous because of my breakdown. Needless to say I was a little late getting home. When I got there, Charlie was asleep on the couch in the living room with ESPN on. I smiled to myself. _He was always there to look out for me._ I thought as I woke him and helped him to bed, before getting in bed myself.

My dream wasn't exactly what you would call a dream. It was an odd experience. Instead of visions of Edward and me I saw colors and words. It was getting weird. I saw things floating by like random words from the dictionary. I was walking through an odd smoky forest that reminded me of the one in Alice and Wonderland. Everything had a smoky look to it, and words like: pain, love, heart, loss, love, life, food, laugh, Christmas, years, and other random words. At the end of the dream I saw the old man again, sitting on a fallen tree. This was what I was waiting for. I went to sit down beside him. _"Hello Bella. So nice of you to join me." He says, smiling. I kept my face straight. "Are you enjoying being human again? Are you getting along okay?" I felt my anger flare. "You know exactly how I've been getting along. This inner monologue thing was a complete surprise, and right when I'm getting the hang of it this shit happens! I'm getting visions now! Visions! Like a true crazy person! I mean what the hell man!" He took my anger calmly and then looked at me. "I told you that there would be a conflict." he said. "That's an understatement" He ignored my comment. "Look your father interrupted our last conversation, so thought I could meet you here and explains everything." I looked at him and nodded, gesturing for him to continue. "Well I can't tell you everything because you're supposed to figure it out. You wouldn't learn anything if you didn't have to figure this mystery out. But I can tell you the basics. You have gone back in time to find true love. You experience the same feelings as you did when you went through this painful experience the first time; however, you have taken all of your memories from the time in which you came from. You know what the consequences are if you choose to give up. Now, today you had visions instead of the inner monologue. You had saw some things that have been taken from your thoughts that you took from the future. That is because sometimes the two battling "voices" merge together into visions sometimes. These visions can be for your cause, or they can be against it." I just stared at him and absorbed his words for a moment before speaking. "That's it? What do you mean you can't tell me everything? You got me into this mess! Will these voices ever stop?" I was frantic. What if the voices didn't stop? I don't think I could handle this forever. "First of all I didn't get you into this, you got you into this. I just helped you get back in time and withheld important information from you. Maybe you will learn to ask questions before trusting some random old man you meet in the woods. And second, yes the voices will stop. But you have to follow the rules, or rather, the riddle." "The riddle? What riddle?" I asked. "Well if you'd shut your trap for a moment I'll explain." I was shocked by his sudden sharpness, but I have to admit, I was being quite annoying. "Thank you. Now, the riddle reads:_

_A journey made back through time and space_

_Where a girl finds a lover to take her husband's place_

_A conflict this will pose as her two worlds collide_

_And she will choose to quit or stick along for the ride_

_Much pain and suffering shall the two lovers endure_

_And a dangerous area will be mistaken for secure_

_A potion a cauldron and a loved one once hated_

_This girl will face to keep her inner thoughts gated_

_This girl and her lover must solve this timed mystery_

_And when the truth is out she will make her own history_

_He looked up at me and I frowned. "So I have to figure this riddle out to stop the voices?" I asked, and he laughed. "My dear child, you figure this out and you will do much more than stop the voices in your head." This got me curious. "Like what?" I asked, hoping his answer would give something away. He smiled once again. "I'm not that stupid. You will see in time." And with that the scene faded and I woke up._

The sun was filtering through my window and I saw the bright pink sky that signaled to me it was early morning. It was finally the weekend. I looked over on my night-stand and spied two small sheets of paper. On it, in fancy writing, was: "I thought this might help you on your quest. Good luck." It was the riddle. But why did he give me two. That question was answered at the bottom of the tiny page. It read, "I know you tend to lose things so I decided to give you two. Keep one on you at all times and put the other one somewhere safe." I snorted. _I don't lose things that often. _I decided to forget about that last comment and put one copy in my desk and the other in the pocket of the pants that I planned to wear today and then got up to take a quick shower before going downstairs. Charlie was already fishing considering the fact that it was a perfect, sunny, Saturday. I made myself some eggs and toast accompanied with some hash-browns and sat down at the table. Once I had finished breakfast and was starting the dishes the phone rang. "Hello?" I answered a little out of breath. "Hey Bells." "Hey Jacob! What's up?" I asked as my heart hammered in my chest. "Nothing much. But I thought that I should take you on a proper date. Would you be up to joining me for dinner and some sightseeing?" "What is there to see in Forks?" I asked, truly curious. "Just trust me." I sighed. I did want some alone time with Jacob. And it was really sweet of him to think about it. "Sure." I said, smiling. "Great! Listen Bells I gotta run. I love you, bye." I was about to ask what time he was going to pick me up at when the line went dead. "Bye." I said a little puzzled. I went back to the dishes, and when I finished 15 minutes later I heard the doorbell ring. This puzzled me even more. I went to open the door expecting some kind of surveyor and instead I found Jacob. "What are you doing here?" I asked. He just grinned. "Well jeez Bells, no greeting? I'm not interrupting something am I?" I hesitated. "Well no, but it's 8 in the morning. You said our date was tonight." I said stating the obvious. "It is. Now come on or we'll be late."_What?_ "What?" I asked staring at him like he was crazy. He turned to me and gave me a soft kiss. "Trust me Bells." he said. "Okay well what should I wear?" I asked flustered. "Wear something for having fun in and bring something really nice to wear for later." he said and I went upstairs to get ready and write a note for Charlie before getting into Billy's car. Jacob started the car and we were on our way. I just wish I knew where we were going. I looked out the window and sighed, watching the trees pass by. I thought we would be going to Port Angeles, but that was until we drove through Port Angeles and left it behind.

"Uhh Jacob. Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise."

"But I hate surprises." I whined. "I know." He said smiling. "Well could you just tell me?" I asked a little irritated. "Nope." he said popping the "p". I smacked his arm and he chuckled, grabbed my hand, and kissed it. The ride was about 3 and half hours, and the whole time Jacob and I were joking and recalling things that happened in the past. After 3 hours and 3 minutes I could see the city. Jake was taking me to Seattle for our date. I looked at him and he grinned while looking at the road. It was about 11:30 when Jake parked the car by the Space Needle. He helped me out of the car and took my hand. We walked across the street and got a city pass before going off to explore. Jacob insisted on paying for both of our passes even though I protested quite a bit. After we got the passes, Jacob took me everywhere. We went on the Duck ride first. It's this bus that takes you around Seattle and there's this tour guide that tells you a bunch of facts about the city. Then, it goes out onto the water and we go around the Puget Sound. After we got back we went to the Science Center. It was so much fun. I went on this bike that they have on a high rail with a net under it. I was terrified. The only reason I did it was because Jacob had done it before me. We did all of these simulations and took some pictures in one of those booths. My favorite part of the center was the butterfly room. They have a bunch of butterflies flying around this tropical room. There are exotic plants everywhere and butterflies flying all around your head. One landed on me. It was pale blue with a long swallowtail. After the butterfly room we went to go see this new movie in the IMAX theater before walking to the car and grabbing our nice attire. Then we went to the Space Needle. We both stopped and looked up at the Space Needle for a moment. It was huge! I think I went once when I was a kid. _It was the last year Renee and Charlie were still together and Sarah was still alive. Jacob had come with us as well as Billy and Sarah. Jacob was six and I was eight. We had gone in the police cruiser so we could all fit. The ride was fun and filled with jokes and laughter. I remember when I had first saw the Space Needle I had gasped and gazed up at it in wonder. Jacob came up beside me, but instead of gasping he said," That doesn't look like a needle. And it does not look tall enough to go in space. Does it have a rocket attached?" Everyone started laughing and he looked confused and then a little disappointed that there wasn't a rocket on the end of it. _I smiled at the memory and Jacob looked at me."Ready?" He asked and I nodded. We walked into the bottom, up the stairs, and showed our city passes at the ticket booth. Then we waited in line for about 20 minutes before we got to the elevator. I smiled. Ahh the infamous elevator. _When we had come to Seattle all of those years ago, I had wanted to go on the elevator alone, and so did Jacob. So as a compromise my parents let Jacob go with me in the elevator. I was so excited as we stepped into the elevator and so was Jacob. The man who operated the elevator talked to my parents about us going alone and they confirmed that it was alright with them. So the man stepped into the elevator and we began to rise. I was fine for until the operator said we were over 200 feet in the air. I started to hyperventilate and I sat on the floor and hugged my knees into my chest. The operator was shocked and didn't know what to do. But Jacob did. He came and sat down by me. I was never that good with heights as a little girl."Bells." he whispered. "Bells it's okay. We're gonna be okay. Bells, honey we're gonna be okay. I'm here." I looked at him and our hands joined. He stayed with me on the floor of the elevator until we reached the top, whispering sweet words to me as we rose hundreds of feet above Seattle. When we got to the top we waited for our parents and then they helped us look through the observation window. I could see all over the city and I was so humbled by the experience. Jacob; however, said, "I knew we weren't in space! It's a conspiracity!" "You mean conspiracy son." Billy asked. "Oh... yeah." Jacob had answered and everyone laughed except for me. I had no idea what conspiracy meant back then and I was rather confused._ "Come on Bells. We have to get in the elevator to go up." Jacob said, once again pulling me out of my memories. Our memories. I got into the elevator and Jacob spoke to the operator before joining me. The operator got out of the elevator and I panicked. "What did you say?" I asked. "Just wanted us to be alone, like last time. Don't worry Bells, I asked Jim and he said that he can operate it from the ground. We will be fine." he said, sensing my anxiousness. "Who's Jim?" I asked. "Oh he's the elevator engineer. He's a really nice guy." he said. "You talked to the guy for about a minute!" I said astonished. "So." he said defiantly. I smiled. Everyone loved Jacob. The doors closed and we started to rise. There was a window so I could see us going up and the higher we rose, the more uneasy I got. I still wasn't too good with heights. I honestly don't know how I worked up the nerves to jump off of that cliff in La Push. Jacob could tell something was wrong so he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind. "Just like last time, huh Bells?" He whispered in my ear. "Yeah. You remember?" I asked. "Of course. How could I forget?" he said as I leaned into him. He gave me a small kiss on my neck and then the doors opened. We stepped out of the elevator and on to the observation deck. We looked out over the city of Seattle and I looked at Jacob. "We aren't in space! It's a conspiracity!" I exclaimed and Jacob busted out laughing.

We continued walking around, reading all of the interesting facts. The sun was starting to go down over the horizon, setting the sky ablaze and throwing beautiful colors everywhere. Once we had completed the circle around the observation deck Jacob told me to change into my things and we both went to the bathroom. I had packed a nice creamy red dress. It gave me a nice hourglass shape and it had a flowing black shawl to accompany it. The dress had thin red spaghetti straps and came up a little at the bottom creating a slightly puffy look that came to my knees. There was a black belt in the middle to accentuate the shawl and I put some blush and a little pink eye shadow on. Then I put some light pink lipstick on and put a gloss over it. After that I got out some nice red wedges and a little red purse before stuffing my everyday clothes into my bag and exiting the bathroom. I saw Jacob standing by the elevator; he was in a black on black tux with gold cuff links. His hair was pulled back into an elegant ponytail and he had on some really nice dress shoes. When he saw me he grinned and waved me over. He was talking to the elevator man Jim. "Wow you know how to pick 'um Jacob. You are one lucky guy." I sure am Jim. "Hello I'm Jim." He said holding his hand out. "Bella." I said shaking it. I then looked at Jacob. "Jim here said that he would take our bags here and set them behind the downstairs counter and we can pick them up later." I looked at Jim. "Thank you Jim." I said sincerely and I could have sworn I saw him blush before he took our bags and left. Jacob then turned to me. _"Bella, baby you look so beautiful. I may have to beat up a couple guys tonight because I know some guy is gonna try to flirt with you. Especially with you looking like this. Do you realize how sexy you are?" I blushed and he led me up some stairs. Before long we came out to the part of the Space Needle that was a restaurant. I remember my mom telling me about it when we came to the Space Needle the first time. "Well honey that's a really fancy restaurant where couples like mommy and daddy go to have alone time. If and when some boy takes you there you call me okay honey?" Renee had told me. "But why is it so important momma?" I asked and Renee. "Because baby, if someone takes you here. They mean business. And I want to know who means business and what kind of business that they want with my little girl." She had said looking me dead in the eye. "Boys are yucky. They are coodie filled and dumb." I said a little pouty. "Jacob's a boy." My mother had reminded me. I looked at Jacob thoughtfully. "No. He's my Jacob." I said before skipping off. _"What are you thinking Bells?" Jacob asked as we waited in line to be seated. "I'm thinking that I'm going to call my mom when I get home." I told him. He looked a little confused, but he didn't press the subject. When we were seated I looked at the menu and I was blown away. Let's just say that I know why my mom said that whoever took me here meant business. Everything here was very expensive. The waiter came by and we both ordered some sprite. I had to giggle at the look on his face. I mean really, who orders sprite in a fancy restaurant. I looked out of the window and realized that we were slowly spinning above the city. The sun had gone down and the lights brought the city to life. I looked back at Jacob to find him gazing at me. I blushed. "What?" I asked a little self conscious. "You are gorgeous Bella. I can't believe you don't recognize it." he said admiring me and making me blush yet again. "I just don't feel pretty." I said. "Good. I don't want you to feel pretty. I want you to feel gorgeous. I want you to feel like you are the sexiest woman in the world because in my eyes, you are. I want you to know that no matter what anyone says you will always be the sexy, funny, clumsy, amazing, smart, caring, selfless, beautiful Bella that you are. And I want you to know that no matter what, I am here. I'm here baby and I am not leaving." He said taking my hand. The candle light made his dark brown eyes glint and made his bark brown skin shine. I reached across the table and caressed his cheek before giving him a deep kiss. I hoped that I could figure out this riddle so I could give him all of me. He deserves my whole heart and I want to give it to him. The waiter came back and gave us a little smile. I guess he saw the kiss. I ordered the cheapest thing on the menu which was the spaghetti and meatballs for $13.99. Jacob got a steak for $21.22. We talked for the rest of the night, recalling different memories. Some of them about our time in Seattle when we were younger and others about our time in Forks. Jacob told me some bizarre stories about Quil and Embry and I told him about Phoenix. I had never felt so at ease, so happy before.

When we were finished Jacob paid and we left. The whole dinner cost $50.72. Not that I was counting or anything. Jacob made his way to the elevator with me trailing behind him. When we got to the elevator Jim was there with a smile on his face. "Hey guys, how was dinner?" He asked us. "It was wonderful." I said looking at Jacob. "Well that's great. I put your bags downstairs under the counter. I can get them for you when we get down there." Jim said as we descended. Jacob put his arms around me and kissed my neck. I sighed and leaned into him and then blushed when I realized that we weren't alone in the elevator. Jim was politely turned around, but I could tell he was smiling. When we got to the lobby we gathered out bags and went to the car. We drove through Seattle and I was so amazed by the city. I mean seeing it in the day time is one thing, but when it's night time it's like the city comes alive. It breaths in and sucks in people that are all dressed up for a party. It fills it's clubs and turns on the lights. It's a whole new side of the city. I was busy looking out the window when Jacob stopped the car to pay for something. I narrowed my eyes and looked at him, obviously confused. He didn't say anything, he just paid and drove us into this parking garage. We kept twisting and turning and then we drove right onto a ferry. When we were parked Jacob turned to me. "The ferry is faster than driving abound the Puget Sound. It cuts about an hour of driving and gives me a chance to have a hands free experience." He said with a gleam in his eye. I caught on quickly and moved closer to him giving him a small chaste kiss on the lips. Then instead of kissing him I lightly brushed my lips against his before whispering, "Thank you for everything Jacob. Thank you for this night. And for giving me the best first date ever. You defiantly made a memory tonight, and this is one I will never forget." "You're welcome Bells. And thank you for giving me a chance. I promise that I will give you so many more memories like this, that will never be forgotten. I want you to remember that I will never hurt you Bella, I promise I will always be there for you." He then kissed me again, but this one was deeper. It wasn't full of mixed emotions like our other one's had been. This was a kiss of pure joy. When I got into my bed that night, that kiss is what lingered in my mind before sleep took me.

Jacob and I hung out every day, and we went on dates at least once a week. Before I knew it, Jacob and I had been dating for 2 months and 7 days. It was November and there was early snow on the ground when things started to change. Embry had been hanging out with Sam, and Jacob was beyond pissed. Quil and Jacob both agreed that something was wrong with Embry. That Sam had threatened him in some way, and was now forcing Embry to do things for him. Of course I knew they were wrong, but they wouldn't believe me if I told them what was really happening. So I let them vent their feelings. On the day before Valentine's Day Jacob and I were at First Beach on our log talking when Sam and the pack came walking up. I felt Jacob tense up. "Hey Jacob. Still hanging out with the white girl?" Paul said and Jacob let out a low growl. Paul backed away, slightly surprised. Jacob glanced at Embry before bringing his gaze to Sam. Jacob glared at Sam and started to shake a little. I put my hand on his shoulder and his arm wound around my waist before tightening. "What do you want Sam?" Jacob asked with malice in his voice. His eyes had darkened and his lips formed a hard line. "Oh nothing. What I can't walk on the beach now?" Sam asked looking right at me. Jacob noticed and his chest rumbled in a tiny growl. "No, but I would appreciate it if you would stop staring and my date and leave us alone." Sam looked me up and down, disgust being the dominant emotion in his eyes. "Yeah, whatever." He sneered before leaving with his pack behind him. I didn't know what was causing Sam to act in such a manner because I know he wasn't like that. I decided to push that to the back of my mind when I felt Jake shaking beside me. I quickly soothed him giving him small love kisses and telling him to calm down. Jacob had been shaking more and more over the past 2 months and I knew that any day now he would blow his top. To ensure that I was there with him when he phased, I was going to ask Mike to come to the movies with Jacob and I tomorrow. I wanted to be there with Jacob during his last few moments of humanity, but I knew Billy would never allow it so I would just ride in the car with him to his place. If it were up to me I would just keep Jake all to myself, but I needed Mike to get Jacob we went to the movies and Jacob got mad at Mike again, he would phase that night.

I woke up the next day with a plan. I got up and got ready for my day before getting in my truck to go to school. On the way to school I went through my plan. I'll admit it wasn't the best plan, and it thrived on improvisation, but it was a plan. I pulled into the parking lot and went to English class, sitting right next to Mike. "Hey Mike." I said, batting my eyelashes. He blinked a bit flustered before he blushed and replied, "Hey." We went through class, and I repeatedly glanced at Mike. He noticed and smiled. When class was over he offered to walk me to my next class, but I declined. I was still with Jacob and I didn't want people to think I was cheating on him. This left Mike even more confused. I went through my daily classes, and did all of my homework in study hall before going to lunch with Jess and Angela. "Oh my god Bella, Jacob is so into you! Why didn't you tell me? He is so sweet, has the body of a god, and a smile to die for. And you two have history! He is the perfect guy to get your mind off of Edward. Who knows, he might even be your new Edward." Jessica said. "No." I said, and she looked at me. "He isn't going to be like Edward. He's gonna be better." I said with a smile on my face. Then I remembered my plan and turned to Jessica and Angela. "Hey I'm going to ask everyone if they want to go to the movies at lunch but I want you to get everyone but Mike to not come." When I said this, Jessica's face screwed up with a hint of pain. "Why just Mike? I thought you were with Jacob." Jess asked meekly. That's when I realized she misunderstood my intentions. "Oh no Jess! Look Jacob and Mike didn't really seem to "bond" when they first met, so I figured if I could get them together with me supervising, they might figure out something they have in common. If I told Mike my real reasons for inviting him he might not want to go so I just wanted a little help. I would never try to steal him from you." When I explained Jess went back to her peppy self, and she agreed to help me as well as Angela. _Step One is done. Hey that rhymes. Shut it!_ We went to lunch and sat down after getting some food. Lauren was nowhere to be seen thankfully. I have to say that I feel a little bad about my harsh words to Lauren, but she deserved all of it. She had it coming for a while. We joked around and talked about the stories that were told the first night I night everyone met Jacob. The main topic was my fight with Lauren, and about how I beat the shit out of her. _You are __**so**__ modest._ She still hadn't come back to school. Word has it she broke a couple of bones. Oh scratch that, I broke a couple of her bones. "Dude she lost her tooth! I mean I have never seen anything like it! And did you see her face? You really messed her up Bella! You broke her leg and her foot!" Eric exclaimed. "That bitch deserved it." Angela claimed. Angela has begun to speak her mind more often, and she always had something funny to say. It was still a little shocking, but it was a good surprise when she said something perverted or rude, because that's how she felt and she was voicing her opinions. When lunch was almost over I asked everyone if they could go to see Face Punch at 5:00. It turns out Ben, Eric, and Tyler were all heading out to Seattle tonight so they couldn't make it. Jess, Angela, and Mike all agreed to go which meant Mike, Jacob and I were going. God planning is hard.

When I finished with my classes I headed over to Jacob's house. "Hey Bells!" he said after pecking me on the lips. "Hey yourself." I replied, kissing him again. "Hey, Jess, Angela, Mike, Eric, Ben, Tyler and I were going to go to the movies. Would you like to come?" I knew that it would just be Jacob, Mike, and I, but he didn't yet. I didn't want him to think I was setting him up with Mike because that would lead to questions, and I'm not sure if he would buy my "bonding" story. "Yeah, sure babe." He said kissing me again. I put my arms around my neck to deepen the kiss when he pulled away? "Hey, I don't want you to start something and then we have to go. How much time do we have?" He asked. "Well it's 4 o'clock now and the movie starts at 5 so I'd say about 30 minutes." I said grinning as he led me into the garage.

At 4:30 we came out of the garage. My hair was disheveled and his shirt was wrinkled from our make-out session. When we got to the theater only Mike was waiting for us and Jacob looked at me for an explanation. I just shrugged my shoulders and told him I would call. I called myself and made up the excuse that Jess and Angela used last time and added on the lie that Eric and Tyler were stuck in homework club. Granted it's a little bit much, but it worked nonetheless. We walked up and found Mike standing on the sidewalk. "Hey Mike. Sorry the others couldn't make it, but we can still go." I said. Mike smiled, obviously happy that the others had come, but he had not yet registered Jacob's presence. Jacob cleared his throat to make his presence know. "Hey Mike." He said, trying to sound polite. "Jacob." Mike said, his face falling a bit. We walked into the theater and sat down. Mike had his hand open for me to hold and Jacob had his open as well. I took Jacob's, seeing as he's my date. Mike was a little let down but he didn't stop. He kept finding excuses to touch me. Like he'd say I had popcorn in my hair, or that there was water on my arm. Every time he touched me I felt Jacob's hand tighten. When the movie was over Mike asked me if I wanted to go back to his place and that was the last straw for Jacob. "What is your problem?" Jacob said in an even voice. "What?" Mike asked innocently. "Can't you see that Bella and I are together?" Jacob said and he started to shake slightly. "Well I didn't know. You haven't told anyone Bella." Mike said. "Well I thought it was clear. I thought you would get the hints. I mean he drops me off almost every day and picks me up. He obviously cares about me. I mean everyone knows we're dating. Now I think you owe Jacob an apology." I said. Mike looked angry and Jacob started to shake even more. "You could do way better Bella. You could use a real man. Not this." he said nodding towards Jacob. I heard Jacob growl and the shaking intensified. I put my hand on his arm to calm him down. "It's okay baby, just ignore him." I said and we started to turn around when Mike grabbed my hand and pulled me towards him. "You could have this." He said, pulling me closer and kissing me. I pushed his face away but he had a strong grip on me. His eyes were closed, but mine were wide open. I saw Jacob pull me away from Mike effectively before punching Mike right in the face. Mike went down and Jacob was shaking violently as we left the theater. When we got in the car I tried to calm him down. "Jake." I whispered, but he ignored me. "Jake." I said putting my hand on his cheek this time. He didn't stop shaking, but he looked at me. "Jake baby calm down. You know none of that is true. I love you. I only want you. You are more of a man than he will ever be." I said looking into his eyes. His shaking stopped for a moment before coming back slightly. "Why do you love me Bells? I mean I am younger than he is, I'm younger than you. I am not a man, and he's right. You deserve a man. So why me?" He asked. I had never considered the fact that he might be insecure and unsure of himself. He was so perfect. "Jake." I said before kissing him softly. "I love you because you're you. Mike, he's just trying to be cool. He's the average school jock. He's on the football team and has a bunch of girls after him. But I love you because you're always yourself around me. You are sweet, smart, sexy, fun and you always bring the best out of me. You're my Jacob." I said, looking into his onyx eyes before giving him another deep kiss before getting in my seat. When we were driving I saw Jacob start to shake and touched his forehead. "Jake you're burning up!" I exclaimed in false surprised. "I do feel a little weird. Hey I'm gonna drop you off at your house and I'll give you your truck later. I'll have it to you by the end of Thanksgiving break, promise." He said changing lanes to go to my house. He pulled into the drive 10 minutes later and his shaking was intensifying. "I'll see you later babe. Call me when you get home." I said giving him a deep kiss. I needed something to remember him by. This was gonna be a long five days.

The first two days were unbearable. I knew that Jacob was probably so confused and it killed me to know that I couldn't help. The school had given us five days off for Thanksgiving break. We got Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday off because of furlough days. He hadn't called me like I had asked him to so I called him about 18 times. I think Billy was a little annoyed but I had to act the part. And in truth, I really did want to hear his voice. The 20th time I called Jacob picked up. "Bella." He snarled. "Jacob?" I asked. His voice was hard and full of anger. "Stop calling me Bella." he said. "But, I was just checking on you, I mean you wouldn't answer my calls and I got worried." His anger was throwing me off making me stutter a couple of times. "Look Isabella, don't call hear anymore. We can't hang out anymore." he said trying to mask the pain in his voice. I remained silent for a while. "Hang out? We can't hang out anymore! I am your girlfriend!" I exclaimed. If he was gonna break up with me then he could at least do it the right way. "I don't remember ever asking you to be my girlfriend." He growled and I caught my breath. I couldn't believe he just dismissed all that we had. I know he's going through tough times, but that give him no excuse to throw me away like a piece of garbage. I was so flustered I hung up the phone. By the fourth day I was seething. I was gonna give him one more day. If he wasn't here by tomorrow at noon I was asking Charlie to take me to the Black's. Of course Billy gave me that I'm sick story but enough was enough. Oh the fifth day at noon I waited. I gave him 30 minutes and he didn't come. "Charlie! Can you drop me off at Jacob's? I need to get my truck before school." I smiled to myself. I was so smart. Jacob couldn't bring my truck back because I had brought the keys with me, thus giving me a reason to go over and confront Jacob. "Sure thing Bells." The 15 minute ride to La Push was nothing short of awkward. Charlie told me to ask if I could see Jacob before I went barging in the house when I told him I was going to stay a while and I was left alone. I sauntered over to the door and knocked. Standing in the door way was Jacob...and the pack. "What Bella?" Jacob asked with malice in his voice. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked clearly annoyed. "Alright, talk." He said. I looked past him at the pack. "Alone." I said bringing my gaze back to him. He sighed and shut the door. "Come on a walk with me." I said, knowing that the pack would be able to hear everything standing where we are now. I started walking into the forest, knowing he would follow. When we had gotten far enough I turned around and sure enough, there he was. "What Bella?" He asked. "You know what. You don't accept my calls and when you finally do you feed me a bunch of crap!" I yelled. I was thoroughly pissed. I didn't care what he was going through, he didn't get to talk to me that way, ever. He just snorted and looked away. "Look at me!" He kept his eyes trained on the ground. "Jacob Ephraim Black the least you could do is look me in the eye when you break my heart." That got his attention. "I mean why-. Is it something I did wrong?" I asked. I knew that wasn't the case but things just started flowing out of my mouth. "What did I do that was so wrong Jacob? I mean I-" I sighed and looked down. "I tried Jacob." I said looking him in the eye. "I really did. I don't know what I did wrong. But that gives you no excuse to dismiss our entire relationship. You treated me just like..." I faltered. My feelings wouldn't let me say it. "Like him right. When were you planning on telling me that he was a bloodsucker?" he asked. "Who?" I couldn't give up their secret just yet. "You know damn well Bella! Edward Cullen. I mean you knew what he was! You KNEW and you still when out with him. You lied to everyone! You lied to me!" He yelled. I looked down at my feet and said nothing. "Just leave Bella." he said turning around. "No." I reached out to him and spun him around again. "No I am not leaving until you stop lying to me. I know you don't have mono Jake. Something is going on and you're not telling me. I am not about to let this happen again. Let me help you." I pleaded. "I don't need your help." "Jacob, please. Don't leave me like this. What happened to you? You cut your hair, got a tattoo, and started hanging out with Sam!" he growled at the last statement. "Don't blame Sam for this! Blame your precious Cullens." he snarled. "I never said I was blaming Sam. And they aren't as precious as you are." I said taking his hands. "Jake, let me come with you inside and we can work this out." for a moment I thought he was going to let me come in, but I was wrong. "Leave Bella. And don't come back. I don't want you to come back here and screw things up." My head snapped up. That was the worst thing anyone had ever said to me. He turned and walked away. "I was wrong about you Jacob" I whispered and he stopped. I knew he had heard me. I walked past him and got into my truck. I cried the whole way home running to my room before Charlie could ask me any questions. I knew he was coming that night. Or at least I hoped he was. I wasn't sure how anything was going to turn out now. Things were changing. From now on things were going to be new and that scared me. I stayed up all night waiting for my Jacob. After midnight I concluded that he wasn't coming and started to softly cry.

I woke at 2 o'clock in the morning. _Who the hell? JACOB!_ I shot right out of bed and opened the window. A few seconds later he was standing in my bedroom half naked. "Bells." "I thought you didn't want to see me. I thought I just screwed things up." Bella-" "You broke your promise Jake." I said turning to face him. He had a guilty expression on his face and brooding eyes. "I'm sorry Bells. I sincerely apologize for my horrible behavior. I love you so much but I can't tell you what's going on with me."

"Why?" "Because- have you ever had a secret you couldn't tell anyone Bella?" he asked, knowing my answer. "Well it's like that." "Then why did you come?" I asked. "To apologize. To tell you that I am nothing without you and that I promise to be better. To beg you for a second chance. And to give you clues as to what I- as to what's wrong with me." I thought for a moment and decided to allow it. "Go on." I said. "Bella I'm so sorry for the way I acted. You didn't deserve that at all. I wish I could explain, but there are certain things that I just can explain to you. I love you so much Bella so please," he said getting down on his knees and pressing his face into my stomach, "Please give me another chance." he said looking up at me. I pretended to think about it for a moment. Of course he was already forgiven but I wasn't about to tell him that. "Fine." I said and he brought my face down to kiss him. I pulled away after the kiss started to get heated, leaving him wanting more. "What are your clues?" I asked. "Right well do you remember when we were walking down First Beach and you tried to flirt with me?" "Yeah." "Do you remember the sto-" He stopped, choking on his words. "The stories about your tribe. You said that your tribe had descended from-" I paused for dramatic effect and looked at him. He looked down at his feet. "Are you serious?" he just nodded still looking down. I lifted his eyes to mine. "I don't care Jacob. I love you. I don't care what you are because at the end of the day, you're still my Jacob." He smiled. It was Sam's smile, but it was a smile. I probably could have sold it a little better but I was so sick of this shit. I just got it over with. "I better go, they'll be looking for me Jacob said turning to the window. I pulled him onto my bed. "Stay with me until I fall asleep?" He paused before getting under the covers. I crushed myself to his warm body. "Hey Jacob." "Yeah?" "Tomorrow I am going to talk to Sam and he is going to explain everything to me. I want you to be there." he chuckled. "Sure Bells." He said before giving me a quick kiss. And that kiss stayed with me as I drifted off into my dreams.

**Okay so this chapter turned out to be over 15,000 words and the longest chapter that I have ever made which is why it took me so long. Sorry about that but here it is! I'm going to make a one shot soon and I would love it if you all read it and reviewed. (Of course it's another JB story) Be on the lookout and review!**

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**ladybug82896: D**

**REVIEW! I'm serious people. I didn't write this long chapter for nothing!**

**P.S. I'm working on my humor but it's all very new to me so I would really love some constructive criticism!**


	8. Things to Explain

**Explanations**

Jacob's POV

This was so fucked up. I was now some sort of shape shifting freak that was domed to this fate since the day I was born. I had to protect the tribe and give up part of my life because those god dammed bloodsuckers decided they wanted to move in. But I could deal with all of that. I mean yeah, it sucked but I could handle it. No, what was fucked up was that I had to break up with Bella. I had just gotten her to trust me. I told her I would never leave her like that stupid leech did and I would have to break my promise to her. All of this wasn't fair. What the hell did I ever do to deserve this shit. Everyone says that it's an honor. They say that I will experience pack unity and a bunch of other bull shit like that, but they don't have to deal with it now.

They had no idea what Bella meant to me and how much it physically hurt me to do this to her. And then on top of all of that I have to worry about some weird shit called imprinting now. I already have enough on my plate but now I have to worry about some weird tribal magic telling me who to love. All of my choices were taken away and yet the only person that could make me feel better, I have to push away. I remember the first time I phased after I had gotten home from the movies with Bella and that marshmallow Mike. Bella was right, there was something wrong with me. I got home to find Sam standing in my driveway with his right hand man Paul next to him.

_"What are you doing here?" I asked. I could feel something in my chest but I ignored it. _

_"We just wanted to warn you, Black." Sam said. I was getting angry, I could feel my body heating up, I felt like I was going to explode and I didn't know why. _

_"Warn me? About what? I didn't do anything, unlike you. You think you run this place, but you don't. You guys are just a bunch jerks. So take your head out of your ass and get off my property." I said with a ferocity that came out of nowhere. _

_"We wanted to warn you about that white whore you've been seeing. That leech lover." Paul said smirking. Sam looked at Paul obviously thinking Paul had gone a bit too far, but Paul stepped forward leaving Sam's gesture unnoticed. _

_"She is not a whore." I said, I felt my body shaking rapidly. The same feeling I got when I caught that man trying to hurt Bella in the alley came over me. Paul stepped closer to me._

_"Hey Black it's okay. But you have to understand that those kind of white ho's aren't allowed to be with us. Especially not with the next expected Chief in this tribe. So you need to tell that bitch to leave and make sure she doesn't come back or we are going to have a problem. Got it pretty boy?" he said. I could feel this warmth spreading thorough my whole body and I was shaking so fast I was vibrating now. _

_"Get off my property, now." I said trying to control myself but his words kept replaying in my mind. No one calls my Bella a whore. Paul's smile grew wider and he stepped even closer. I got in my face and said, "Make me." Before pushing me. Then...I exploded. The heat traveled down my body and I felt immense pain. I could feel my bones shifting and my muscles contorting in an inhuman nature. Then before I knew it I was on top of Paul, biting and ripping his flesh. Sam was between us in a flash. "Calm down and get off of Paul." Sam said, his voice strong and controlled. The weight of his voice caused my body to go weak and I stepped off of Paul._

He took me back to his house with Paul in tow and explained everything. He told me how all of our legends were true and how we turned whenever there were vampires around because we had to protect the tribe. He told me about imprinting and how once I found my soul mate I would only love her. I would be loyal to her and would be forced to be with her and I would be willing to do anything for her. And they told me about the Alpha commands and about my rightful place as Alpha which Sam would hand over when he thought I was ready. I took and deep breath and got up from his couch telling them I needed to see Bella when they stopped me. They told me that I couldn't see Bella anymore_. _To say that I was upset would be an understatement. I phased on spot and had to be calmed down again. Sam gave me another pair of shorts and said that I would need to take them off before phasing and that I would probably need to buy some new one's because I would apparently get bigger, taller, and begin eating more. I shrugged off the new information and went right to Bella.

_"Why can't I see her?" I asked already mad again. _

_"You are unstable right now and you might phase close to her and hurt her, like I did... We just can't risk that right now." Sam explained. _

_"Alright so once I am more stable I can go see her?" I asked anxiously. _

_"Not exactly" Sam said. _

_"What do you mean not exactly." I said in a hard tone that the human me would have never used._

_"This is a secret Jacob. You can't tell outsiders. You can't tell anyone. Not Quil, not Bella, no one. It's best for you to just stay away." Sam said with a nod of agreement from Paul._

_"So becase I turn into a wolf I have to give up the girl that I have been fighting for since I was little? I don't think so. I'm telling her." I was not going to give up Bella._

_"You can't tell her Jacob and that is final." I heard his Alpha voice and my body yielded to his request. I looked up at him with a broken heart. How could he take Bella away from me. She is my life, my love, my world. What the hell was I supposed to do with out her. She kept me grounded and relaxed and she loved me, just like I loved her. Sam looked down on me with pity while Paul scoffed at my sorrow. He was really starting to get on my fucking nevers. I was still pissed at him for talking about Bella in such a degrading manner, even if he was just trying to get me to change. _

_"Look Jacob, I know it's hard right now but it will get better once you imprint." Sam said._

_"And what if I don't imprint. You said that it was rare so what will I do then? Wander the earth alone, never changing and forever young. I'd rather kill myself. What would I have to live for with no one by my side?"_

_Sam said nothing. He just turned around and went to find Emily upstairs. I was so pissed! I got up and left, walking to my house. I can't believe this happened. I know he had to egg me on because I was dangerously close to phasing in front of Bella, but now out of all times. Now when our relationship is still rather young. I entered my father's housed dejected and extremely tired_

I had gone for 3 days without talking to Bella, and though it might sound sappy, it was the longest I had ever gone without talking to her. I had just woke up to find my irritated father hanging up the phone. "She won't stop calling. She is set on talking to you." He said rolling himself down the hall and into his room. Sure enough a minute later I heard the phone ring. I was so happy that she had called this many times and so mad that Sam wouldn't let me talk to her.

I_ answered the phone angrily only to find Bella's soft sweet voice. "Jake?" I could hear the confusion in her voice. Why couldn't I tell her? _

_"Stop calling me Bella." I said through to phone. No point in dragging it on. I just needed to get it out. _

_"But, I was just checking on you, I mean you wouldn't answer my calls and I got worried." she was confused, I was confused. Damn I wished I could help her._

_"Look Isabella, don't call hear anymore. We can't hang out anymore." I tried to mask the pain in my voice but I knew some was seeping through._

_"Hang out? We can't hang out anymore! I am your girlfriend!" she was pissed off. There was no way she was going to back down. Why couldn't I tell her? I wanted to tell her so badly but instead I have to rip her heart out. I knew what I had to say, and I knew what it would do to her._

_"I don't remember ever asking you to be my girlfriend." I growled into the phone. There was a long lasting silence and then the dial tone was blasting in my ear. I just stood there, falling apart inside. I couldn't breath. I had just dismissed our whole relationship, everything we had. Stupid fucking phasing. Stupid fucking bloodsuckers!_

In the day that followed I followed Sam, Paul, Jared, and Embry, learning the ropes and what times I would be partolling. The mind reading thing was really getting on my nerves but I was informed that I would get used to it. They taught me about hunting animals and told me that I could hunt as a wolf or eat human food. I was definitely eating human food, especially if Emily was cooking for me or... Bella. I had to push thoughts of her out of my mind repeatedly to keep from breaking down in front of the guys. The things I had said to her kept replaying in my head and pretty soon Sam said that we were done. I knew he could hear everything and he just didn't want to. I had picked everything up almost instantly anyway, so after my "lessons" Embry and I went to a movie. That day wasn't as bad, but that night was horrible. I had dreams about Bella, it was like she was next to me. But then I would wake up only to find empty space next to me. The next day was the last day of our break and I knew I had to bring Bella's truck back, but I didn't have the strength to face her. It's funny that I'm this superhuman and I can't face the love of my life. The whole day I was just going through the motions. Patrolling, talking, eating. I was to worried about facing Bella. After patrol the pack came by my house to discuss the patrol for tomorrow when there was a knock on the door. I went to open it and found a very angry Bella. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" She asked, obviously irritated. "Alright, talk." I said in a hard voice. "Alone." she said, her tone matching mine.I sighed and shut the door knowing that whatever she wanted to talk about couldn't be good. Turns out I was right.

She started asking questions that she had every right to know the answer to and yelling at me which I deserved. And I delivered painful responses that I could tell hurt her. But it wasn't the real me, I wish she knew that. Saying those things to Bella hurt, but some of her responses hurt me even more. Some were so loving I thought I was going to cry and others were so full of raw emotion that I almost lost all control. But what I remember clear as day are her last words.

_"I _was _wrong about you Jacob."_

The words replayed over and over and every time I began to shake more. _I have to see her and try to explain. _I thought. The only way I would be able to do that is if I completed my shift and didn't tell Sam. I sighed. This was going to be the longest patrol ever. It was just me today. The others were at Sam's probably eating. I started to run around La Push and then Forks. Then, before I knew it I was near Bella's house.

_You can't go yet Jacob. Patience._ I took a deep breath and began to walk away when I heard her sniffle. She had been crying, and it was all my fault. In that moment I threw everything into the wind and phased, putting my shorts on. I used the free next to her window and eventually she let me in. _Thank you. _I could tell by the redness in her eyes that she had been crying, and judging by the guarded posture she was expressing I knew she was still mad at me. "Bells-" I said softly. "I thought you didn't want to see me. I thought I just screwed things up." she said before I had time to say anything else, her glare cutting through me. I sighed, "Bella-"I began again. "You broke your promise Jake." she said as if I didn't know. As if it didn't hurt me too. "I'm sorry Bells. I sincerely apologize for my horrible behavior. I love you so much but I can't tell you what's going on with me." I said. I knew she wasn't just going to take it. "Why?" she asked. "Because- have you ever had a secret you couldn't tell anyone Bella?" I asked her, knowing full well that she did,"Well it's like that." I said. "Then why did you come?" she asked. "To apologize. To tell you that I am nothing without you and that I promise to be better. To beg you for a second chance. And to give you clues as to what I- as to what's wrong with me." I could see that she was thinking about whether or not she was going to allow me to make my case or not. Finally she said, "Go on." _Okay now what. I can't just come out and tell her, "Honey... I'm a werewolf. _I wasn't ready for that yet so I thought it best to apologize first."Bella I'm so sorry for the way I acted. You didn't deserve that at all. I wish I could explain, but there are certain things that I just can explain to you. I love you so much Bella so please," I said getting down on my knees and pressing his face into my stomach, "Please give me another chance." I said. I was holding onto her for dear life.

_What if she says no... lets not think about it. _I looked up at her. "Fine." she said. I pulled her down into a kiss. Letting go of all my stress. I started kissing her sweetly but some how I ended up with my tongue in her mouth and hers in mine. It was so hot that I seriously thought I was about to get some, but she pulled away and brought us to the subject I wish didn't exist. "What are your clues?" she asked expectantly."Right well do you remember when we were walking down First Beach and you tried to flirt with me?"I said, smiling a bit at the memory. Why she thought she needed to try and flirt me was always lost on me. I've been whipped since I was four years old. "Yeah." she replied. "Do you remember the sto-" _Jacob what are you doing? _Sam's voice invaded my mind. _Leave me alone Sam. I have to do this. _He began to protest but I shut him out. "The stories about your tribe. You said that your tribe had descended from-" she answered for me and stopped. Her eyes grew wide. I looked down at my feet. I wouldn't be able to stand it if I saw a look of disgust on her face. "Are you serious?" she asked. I nodded, still looking down. _Shit, she's going to put me out. _I felt her hand under my chin lifting my eyes to hers. "I don't care Jacob. I love you. I don't care what you are because at the end of the day, you're still my Jacob." she said. I looked her with utter disbelief for a moment before giving her a grin for the ages. _My girl is the coolest girl on EARTH! _I looked at her bed-side alarm and I was late for my patrol. "I better go, they'll be looking for me." I said. I started to get up but she pulled me towards her bed. "Stay with me until I fall asleep?" I smiled again. Not only did she still love me but she trusted me next to her in her bed.

I chuckled and got under the covers. She pushed herself into my chest and I put my arms around her. "Hey Jacob?" she said after a minute. "Yeah." I answered back."Tomorrow I am going to talk to Sam and he is going to explain everything to me. I want you to be there." she said and I had to laugh at the thought of her ordering Sam around just like he does us. "Sure Bells." I said giving her a kiss. She smiled into my chest. A few minutes later her heart rate slowed as well as her breathing and I knew she was asleep. I got up and gently put her head on the pillow before exiting her room. As soon as I phased a jumble of voices hit me. _  
__"What the hell Jake!" _Sam said_.  
__"I had to Sam." _Is what I replied with.

_ "Bullshit Jake!" He roared. _I felt my wolf wanting to buckle at the familiar Alpha voice but instead I stood tall and he backed off a little.

"_What I want to know is how you got around the order." _Paul said.

_"I didn't directly tell her. I just gave her a few clues and she figured it out."_I said.

_"You went through all this shit for a leech lover? I don't understand what's so great about that pale face!" _Sam said.

That was the last staw. No one talks about Bella like that. I lunged at him and pinned him into the soft forest floor. _"Do not talk about her like that. I don't care what you are feeling, and I don't give a fuck if you're mad at me. But you under no circumstance talk to or about her in that fashion again!" _I growled in anger.

I knew my Alpha voice was being used because I saw chills go down his spine as well as Paul's. I still didn't want to be Alpha so I got off of him. He just needed to know that I will not tolerate that. Paul was looking at me in wonder while Sam glared.

_"Is he Alpha now?"_ Paul asked the question we were all wondering._ "No." _I said. I knew that I had not taken the full position yet.

_"Then how the hell did that happen?" _he asked_._

_ "How the fuck should I know."_ I said still irritated.

_ "Im going to do my patrol." _I said and began running. I just needed to blow off some steam. I shot through the forest, and without a word they were out of my head and leaving me to my own thoughts.

~repeat~

I woke up the next morning late for school. Normally if I was a few minutes late I would rush but I was 3 hours late. "Fuck it." I said and I made my way to the kitchen for breakfast but found a not from dad.

_I knew you had patrols last night. I also know you made a detour. Good job son, I hope it worked out. I figured I would let you sleep. It seemed like you had a long day. I called the school for you and told them you were sick. Handle your business and have a little fun. You deserve a day off. The keys are on the table. I'm at Harry's if you need me._

_~Dad_

The first thing that popped into my head was to see Bella. Unfortunately the second thing was that she was probably in school. I could pick her up but it was was only 11 in the morning and she wouldn't be getting out for another four hours, so the question is what to do until then. My mind went to the Rabbit. I haven't worked on it with everything that's been going on. I made my way to the garage and got to work. Working on cars always calmed me down. Before I knew it it was time for me to pick up Bella. I pulled up to the curb and waited. I heard the bell ring and people came pouring out of the school. I waited patiently until I saw Bella. I smiled until I saw that that prick Mike was messing with her again. I went to the nearest parking spot and hopped out of the truck making my way over to them. When I got close enough for them to see me I saw Bella's face light up and Mike's eyes get huge. It was then I realize what he was seeing. He was seeing a guy who had in one week gotten tall, buff, and over all someone that could definitely beat the shit out of him. "Hey Jake." she greeted me instantly moving to the spot by my side and putting her arm around my waist. I'm not sure if it was to send a message to Mike or to hold me back from hurting him in front of everybody. I glared at Mike for a second more before turning to her and smiling. "Hey Bells." I said giving her a small peck on the lips. I wish it was longer but if I kissed her how I really wanted to she would be embarrased.

I then turned back to Mike. "So, you wanna tell me why I saw your hand around my girl a minute ago?" I asked. He backed up a little. "I was umm- I was going to walk her to her car." _Shit, I forgot she brought her truck._ "That doesn't require you're hand around her does it Mike." I said, loving the fear in his eyes. He should be scared because after all the shit he said to me I should be in the middle of making imprints of his face on the cement walls right about now. "N-no I guess not. S-sorry, it won't happen again." he said. "It better not," I said and I got a little closer to him until I felt Bella's hand tighten around my waist and I couldn't go further. He was now backed up against the wall. "Or I'll have you're ass hanging up on the top of the flagpole by your tidy whities." I said. I saw him gulp and decided I was satisfied. I backed up with Bella and walked to the parking lot with my arm around her. I lead her to her car before she turned to me with a big smile on her face. "What's so funny?" I asked. "Did you see his face! I thought he was going to piss his pants!" She said giggling. I couldn't help but laugh with her. "How did you get her Jake?" she asked when our laughter subsided.

"I brought the truck and was going to pick you up but I forgot that you would bring your truck." I said. "That's sweet, but why aren't you in school. I was planning on picking you up seeing as you get out 20 minutes after I do." she said. "Oh I didn't go. Remember what happened last night? What I told you?" I couldn't be specific in public. "Oh. I understand. So you must have gotten in really late huh?" she asked. "Yeah. When I woke up I was already 3 hours late to school and then found Billy had just called me in as sick so I could have a day off." I explained. "Oh, well that was nice." there was an awkward pause. "So it seems like we have a dilemma here with the mode of transportation." she said. "Yeah. I guess you'll just have to ride in your truck down to the rez and I'll ride next to you." I said. "Sounds like a plan." she said, and with that she climbed into her ancient truck. I went over to the truck and got on, glaring at Mike one last time before I started it up and left.

**Bella's POV**

I woke up alone. The only sign that last night wasn't a dream was the slight dent in the mattress and the lingering heat of Jake. I sat up and stretched before getting out of bed and getting ready for school. I went through my daily routine, brushing my teeth, taking a shower, brushing my hair, and making sure my backpack had all the necessary things in it before toasting a pop tart and getting in my truck. The drive was peaceful and I had no mental disturbances. I was beginning to feel hopeful that they would never come back but of course that's not what the prophecy says so I could do nothing but enjoy the temporary silence. As I pulled into the parking lot I couldn't help but notice how far I now had to park away from the school without Edward saving me a spot. I mean of course I was used to it by now, and all that special treatment wasn't good for me anyway. I shouldn't get used to be treated like a porcelain doll all the time. Every where I went there he was, making sure people were taking care of me when they had borrowed me from him and making sure I didn't get broken. It's more healthy for me to get treated like a human and for me to walk like the rest of the kids. I got out of my truck and made my way over to my locker. When I shut it I was staring face to face with Mike. "So hey Bella." he said with a smile as he leaned against the lockers next to me. "Can I help you?" I asked. I couldn't stop the irritation from leaking into my voice, not like he noticed.

"Yeah you could actually. I was wondering if I could walk with you to English?" he said. "Mike I really don't think that's a good idea." I said and his face dimmed. "Why?" he asked. "Because I'm with Jake and I don't think it would be appropriate." I said. He seemed to think about it for a second before he responded with, "Well what if we walked as friends?" he asked hopeful once again. "I-"I stopped. What was I supposed to do with that. I can't exactly turn him down when he offers something like this without telling him we're not friends. "Sure." I said defeated. We walked together and he chattered away the whole time. He tried to grab my hand a few times but I evaded it. When we finally got to class I said goodbye and moved to my seat in the back of the class while he dejectedly sat down in the front. I breathed out a sigh and the teacher began to talk. We were reading Jane Austen Pride and Prejudice. I had read it multiple times, there was no need for me to read it again so I checked out and began to think. What could that prophecy mean. I guess the best thing to do would be to decipher it line by line. I pulled it out of my pocket and set it in the book to act like I was reading:

_A journey made back through time and space_

_Where a girl finds a lover to take her husband's place_

_A conflict this will pose as her two worlds collide_

_And she will choose to quit or stick along for the ride_

_Much pain and suffering shall the two lovers endure_

I t_And a dangerous area will be mistaken for secure_

_A potion a cauldron and a loved one once hated_

_This girl will face to keep her inner thoughts gated_

_This girl and her lover must solve this timed mystery_

_And when the truth is out she will make her own history_

_A journey made back through time and space.__And she will choose to quit or stick along for the ride. _I guess that I have to choose whether or not to stay here or... go back maybe. Could that happen? Could he take me back? _Much pain and suffering shall the two lovers endure. _Well that line was awfully foreboding. What kind of pain, physical or mental? And which lover? If Jake got hurt because of my bad choices I would never forgive myself. _And a dangerous area will be mistaken for secure._ The only logical thing for this line would be that someone or some_thing_ is going to break through the wolves' patrols. _A potion a cauldron and a loved one once hated._ This line stumped me. I mean we are in modern times and this line is semi-medieval. _This girl will face to keep her inner thoughts gated._ It's obvious that I am the girl but what are the things I will have to face. A potion a cauldron and a loved one once hated? What the hell does that mean! _This girl and her lover must solve this timed mystery. _Okay so there is a time limit on this. And what is the mystery. Is this prophecy the mystery or is it something that will happen later on? And what happens if we can't solve it in time? _And when the truth is out she will make her own history. _Does this mean I have to choose again. Why would I need to do that when I've already chosen Jake? I went back in time for him and am slowly going insane, why would I not choose him after everything is said and done? Well that's just what pisses me off about riddles, I have all of these questions and no way to answer them. I gave a frustrated sigh which earned me a couple of glances from a few of my classmates.

_What's she looking at? Hasn't she ever seen a girl in love before? _And just like that the voices were back. I put my head into my hands acting like I had a headache before I got it full force and I just looked stupid. And there is my mind speaking. Let me guess, next comes, feelings. _Damn straight. I'm willing to look past these past few days and your rudeness towards me for sending you those visual reminders of your time with Edward. _My stupid feelings said. _God I need names for you guys. _I thought. It was getting weird calling them "mind and feelings". _How about feelings, you're Rosaline and mind you can be... Janice._ I thought. _Why am I Roasaline! And I really don't think I deserve to be Janice. That girl from Friends is so annoying and I know that's where you got the name! I'm trying to help you get Jacob! _They both exclaimed in my mind and I couldn't help but smile. _Because you're both annoying and you are both getting on my nerves and getting in my way. I just gave you the name Rosaline feelings because that character distracted Romeo from Juliet in the beginning of the story just like you're trying to distract me now. I gave you the name Janice, which is from Friends, because even though she's annoying at least she's not a man stealer and she's not as much of a threat just like you aren't a threat to me and my cause. _I thought the names suited them._ Fine then! If this is the thanks I get for trying to get you back to Edward who just happens to be your TRUE love then fine, I'll deal with it! Rosaline said. I thought we were friends Bella! And although I'm angry with you I'm more angry with Rosy at the moment so I'll stick by you as well. Janice said. Yeah, cause that's what I wanted._ I sarcastically replied.

Only then did I notice that the class room was quiet and everyone was looking at me. "Miss Swan are you listening to music back there?" My English teacher asked warily. I think she was hoping the answer was yes for my sake. "No, I'm sorry for disturbing the class, I was merely thinking aloud." I said, my cheeks were burning. "Alright then." she said still looking worried, but she continued with her lesson. By then the voices were gone, thank god.

~repeat~

Rosaline and Janice didn't show up after the English incident. During lunch I sat with the usual group which included Lauren once again unfortunately. At least she's not as mean to me as she used to be. I think after our little fight she's a little scared of me. She never says anything to me but she sends me murderous glares. "Oh my goodness, you should have seen Bella in English class today. She was totally thinking aloud today and she didn't even notice. It was so funny!" Mike rambled on on my "epic fail" today in class. Lauren looked like she wanted to say something but I gave her a glare that probably said something like "don't fuck with me or you're gonna get your ass kicked again". Whatever it was it worked because she kept her mouth closed and settled for talking to Tyler. They had their own on again off again relationship. After sitting though lunch and getting laughed at I went through the rest of my day pretty smoothy. Biology was getting better and it was almost the end of the day. The only class left was P.E. Of course that was the class that completely ruined my day. We were playing dodge ball. I got hit in the face more that any other person in the gym and to top it all off when I was done Mike met me again and offered to walk me to my car as a "friend" of course. When we were almost to the parking lot he somehow got his hand around my shoulder, and just when I was about to push him away Jake came up from nowhere. I happily greeted him and moved next to him before putting my arm around his waist. It was mainly just because I liked being next to him and holding him but it was also to hold him back just in case he couldn't control his temper. He glared at Mike before greeting me. He gave me a small kiss which I was extremely grateful for. I need to feel his lips on mine but I didn't want to give everyone out here a show which is what I thought was going to happen to send Mike a message.

Speaking of Mike, he was slowly backing up, eyes wide. Jake took advantage of this and threatened him. I tightened my grip on him when he tried to move forward and then it was all over. He lead me to my truck and helped me in after we had a good laugh about the situation with Mike and we decided that he was going to ride next to me or behind me seeing as he tried to pick me up without realizing I would have my truck. The ride down was silent without Jake in the car next to me, but we got there soon enough. We had decided to drive to his place because I "didn't know where Sam's was". I knew that the next few hours was going to be redundant because I've heard this before but it needed to be done so I could be active in the pack and make sure they are all safe when they phase. It might even help me figure out this prophecy. Jake helped me out of his truck when we stopped at his house.

"Thanks Jake." Is all I got out before he pulled me into his chest and kissed me with fervor. I felt him everywhere. He was overriding my senses and I was loving it. I moaned into the kiss and Jake pushed me up onto the hood of my truck so I wouldn't have to stand on my toes. I asked for entrance with my tongue and he granted it without hesitation. Our tongues danced together as we unleashed all of the stress and all of the feelings that have been going around the past week. His hand went to the small of my back and he began to draw small circles with his fingers. I put my arms around his neck and pulled him closer by his new short hair. I was sad when he cut his hair but it was coming in handy. Jake gently pushed me back even more and I was laying down on the hood of my truck with him nearly on top of me. Needless to say if my dad decided to visit the Blacks right now he would never let me come over here unsupervised again. I desperatley wanted to keep going but I knew we had to stop. It was still to early in our relationship to have sex. But in the next couple months, hell maybe in the next couple of weeks, I wasn't going to be able to hold myself back any longer. I slowly pulled back before giving him a peck on the lips and looking into his eyes. "Well if that's how you say you're welcome I'm going to have to thank you more often." I said and he just smirked and gave me another peck on the lips before helping me up. So what do you want to take?" I asked.

"Lets take mine. It can go faster." He said. "Hey! Was that a jab at my truck?" I asked acting offended. "What? Me make fun of your truck? Never." He said with a playful smile on his face. "Shut up and get in the truck Jake I said going over to the passenger side to find the door already open and Jake in the front seat. Seeing my face he smiled. "Werewolf speed." he said. I rolled my eyes and put on my seat belt. "So Bells I was thinking, we're having our homecoming dance and I was wondering if you would go with me?" Jake said. I could tell he was nervous because his hands were twisting back and forth on the steering wheel. I smiled. Edward would have gone through some extravagant speech about how it would be a good human experience, promise it wouldn't be a big deal, and then tell Alice to come over and dress me up like her own personal Barbie. Jake asked me on the car ride over to Sam's house. I know most girls would prefer Edward's way, but I'm a simple girl and I found it endearing that Jake was nervous first of all, and that he asked me in a way that was better for both of us.

"Sure. But I can't promise that I won't step on your toes. I'm really not the best dancer." I said sheepishly. "Oh don't worry Bells. Werewolf remember? You can't hurt me." He said. "Don't be so sure." I said. "Is that a challenge?" He asked? "Bring it baby." I responded. In that moment he pulled off onto the shoulder of the road and took a pocket knife out of the glove compartment and brought it to his hand making a huge gash. I screamed. He winced a bit when the knife bit through his skin but as soon as he got some of the blood out of the way with the napkin it wasn't there anymore. Of course I knew that was going to happen but I still didn't like it. "Oh my god Jacob don't do that! I don't care if you have werewolf healing powers! You scared the shit out of me!" I exclaimed. He chuckled and started the car up. After a few minutes of silence he said, "Soooooo I think it's safe to say I won." And that got us laughing all the way to Sam's house. Once we got out of the car and knocked on the door to meet a very irritated same the smiles were gone. "Sam, I need to speak with you." I said. He looked at me like I was crazy before letting us in. I made my way to the living room and sat down on the couch before motioning for him to do the same. I know that as being Alpha he probably wasn't used to getting ordered around but at this point it needed to be done.

He sat down with the same look on his face and Jacob sat next to me and interlaced our fingers. "Well Sam it comes to my attention that you are the one in charge. So I came to you for some answers. I already know about you and I'm not about to go scream bloody murder. It really doesn't phase me at all. However I would like to know some things about the pack and how all of this happened." I said. There was a long pause before I answered. "Why should I tell you. You might just run back and tell your leeches." he said, malice in is tone. That was a low blow. I didn't know this was how Sam felt about me at this point. "Well as you can see Sam, those "leeches" aren't here. And either you tell me or I find another way." I said. His eyes immediately shifted to Jacob. "So why don't you just tell me." I suggested. He looked back and forth between Jake and me before he caved. He told me the legends, about the vampires and how the gene is activated when they are around, the pros of being a wolf as well as the cons, Jacob's patrol schedule, and imprinting. That was a conversation that Jacob got a little fidgety about. He gauged my reaction very carefully.

When it was all said and done we all had a better understanding of each other. I left with Jake and we went back to his house to get my truck. When it was time to say goodbye Jake and I were on the driver's side of my truck kissing when all of a sudden he pulled back. I knew something had been bothering him ever since the meeting with Sam, but I thought it best to keep quiet. "Bella, about this imprinting. I just want you to know that no matter what you will always be the girl for me. I hope you know that. I love you with my whole heart and is something that can never be taken. I'm not going to imprint but I just need you to know." he said. "I believe you. I trust you with my life Jake. I know you will never hurt me. I trust you Jake." I said putting a hand on his cheek. He kissed me one more time. I could tell he was putting everything into this one to hold him until next time and so was I. When we pulled back we were out of breath and the sun was nearly all the way set. I opened the door to my truck and got in giving Jake one last look. "I love you." I said. "I love you too Bells." he said before shutting my door. And with that I made my way home.

**I really like the show Friends as you can tell. I really don't know what's going to happen next and I need some kick-ass ideas so please leave me something. I'm in such a deep hole right now and I don't know what to do next.**

**~ladybug82896**


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